It’s going to be a long hard drag, but we’ll make it. ---Janis Jopin Some people start each day with a groan. They act like staying sober is no fun at all. They may have turned over their illness to their Higher Power. But they haven’t yet turned over their will and their life. They don’t see that a loving Higher Power can change them into happy people. Maybe they don’t want to change. They just want to feel better. After all, that’s one reason we all took drugs or drank---to feel better without changing. The program asks us to be willing to change. That’s how we become happier people.....Prayer for the Day Higher Power, help me listen to Your voice. Teach me that following Your directions will make me happy.
#######ROSIE....amen, janis.....this is a long hard drag, but i believe i'll make it too......i start each day with prayer and meditations for self love and love for the universal.....i "get with" my HS, to begin my day with the light around me, and with a loving and positive note.....i don't get up and say "oh shit whats gonna happen to me today???" even tho it HAS been one thing after another lately, i just keep chanting my cleansing chants, and doing my "protection affirmations" and try to put one foot in front of the other....i mean i end up ok.....lots of resistance in my endeavors....road blocks, i have to go around, seems like nothing has gone smoothly in AGES.....but i figure it will change if i keep giving it up.....releasing it.....releasing ME....and doing the first 3 steps..........i don't know when i really admited my defeat....it was VERY recently...i mean i actually had to be aware for a while, but ACCEPT it??? that took time....than the action was to give my broken soul/ mind over to my higher self, the god within me, and quit fighting it..........i want to change....i crave it more than anything.......feeling better is not lasting....i want REAL change....REAL recovery....that LASTS.....i want my LIFE to change...not just a temporary "feel good" drink......i am WILLING to change.....and i too ask my HS to "help me listen...CALM my nerves, my muscles, my mind.....SHOW me i can trust in you and walk with you with JOY"............
Action for the Day Today, I’ll list three things in my life that I haven’t yet turned over to my Higher Power. Why are these things so important to me? What can I do to turn them over?
#####ROSIE.... today i turned over my inabillity to feel trust for hp when i am not in control.......today i said i was WILLING to turn over my NEEDING to be in control/ else i panic and get angry when i cannot "force" projects to go my way...........RECENTLY i turned over the hate and resentment for my abuser..........VERY recently i became WILLING to turn over my NEED to "force/maniplate/push/control my recovery.......DONE
Poor Janis. She didn't make it......... For me, change is AWESOME! Hard? sometimes but mostly NOT! I welcome change. For me change means feeling comfortable in my own skin for the first time in my life! Change means getting up everyday knowing I don't have to drink, knowing I won't drink today. Change means accepting who I am, defects and all and working on them to the best of my ability. Change means when I start to feel self pity, I get up, get out and do something for someone else. Change! I love it.
Doll
__________________
* We eventually realize that just as the pains of alcoholism had to come before sobriety, emotional turmoil comes before serenity. *
thanks doll, yeah, even tho it feels like hell for me now....i'll take change ANYday over "feeling good".....TODAY i did NOT drink.....it is good to experience and NOT be numb....even if it hurts, i know it is productive pain........its like i am in the dentist chair and he is pulling this big infected tooth....he is pulling and twisting and i am hurting like hell, but i know something poisonous is leaving (my addictions/ fears/ controlling etc) ......when he finally gets the diseased thing all the way out....i will heave a sigh of relief, feel sore for a while, but i will FEEL the upward movement so much better.....than i MAINTAIN what i have gained with the "flossing" of this program........i appreicate what you have to say, doll, hope U had good turkey day......
Life time program Rosie---we worked damned hard to get here.:)
I figure I should have this program down pat, by the year 2092. Doh!
We are human..we keep it simple... if possible---and we just do the best we can...and as has been mentioned...we give of ourselves to others...as they have given to us..and we do it from our hearts...unselfishly..
__________________
Easy Does it..Keep It Simple..Let Go and Let God..
Life time program Rosie---we worked damned hard to get here.:) I figure I should have this program down pat, by the year 2092. Doh! We are human..we keep it simple... if possible---and we just do the best we can...and as has been mentioned...we give of ourselves to others...as they have given to us..and we do it from our hearts...unselfishly..
Congratulations Rosie!!!!
It sounds like you are on the right path. I welcome change now. In the beginning I didn't, because I was very comfortable with what I new, and that was disfunctional to me and everyone in my direct path. It was very frightening to give yourself to something unknown.
When I came into AA, it was a relief to get honest. The strength and joy of the group helped me to welcome change with a little less fear. I find today, that adversity is just truly a Stepping Stone for better character.
I have found that we live in an evil world. By working the steps it is easier for me to see the traps, and I have learned that I have a choice to step around them today. I know who I am today, and I know what I want in my life, and what I don't. I have the choice to add or deleat. I find that whatever is not useful to my recovery, I can pitch out. This keeps my sobriety and life very simple.
Keep up the good work Rosie. I am very proud of you. You seem to really be seeking such a powerful and honest relationship with your HP. This is truly what has worked for me. My HP is my closest friend. To keep friendships, we must love, respect, honor and most of all spend quality time and communicate. If I chose Not to do this, my life starts becoming unmanageable. OOPS, before I know it I can be right back at step one, without even picking up a drink. Thanks for letting me share!
Attitude of Gratitude!! May sunshine and rainbows bless your spirits from within!!!
