Zach and I walked around downtown for a good two hours, and what is there to mainly discover? Mostly bars. I wondered how it must be for Zach now, to have to spend the rest of his life with me, never stopping in for some live music, which we used to love to do. I feel bad today, that I can't just be normal.
The greatest gift was that he never once has drank in front of me, or even inclined that he's wanted to. Thanks HP for this guy : )
I feel like a seed today in AA, and that is all. But I'm here.
-- Edited by justadrunk on Sunday 9th of September 2012 08:21:53 PM
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
Sounds like you had a great time despite the curves that life threw at you. That's a gift in itself. Don't think that you'll never be able to walk into a establishment that serves alcohol, especially to listen to some music. It's just not recommended in the first year. At some point (different for all of us) we lose the compulsion (or it's removed) to drink. After that happens, we just need to "maintain our spiritual condition" ever reminding us not to take that first drink. With all said and done, we can go and do anything we want to. I was told that it's probably not a good idea (at length of sobriety) to go out to bars with a person or group that is just wanting to drink. That there should be some good reason for us to be there besides just hanging out with them. I love listening to live music and do every chance I get. Our town has a lot of festivals and clubs. It doesn't bother me a bit to go have a good time, listen to good music and drink my ice tea, water, diet coke with lime... and enjoy myself. It's way better than it ever was while drinking.
Aloha JAD...and thanks for the imagining...and I'm grateful for Dean's response to it because that is the thought process and experience which helped me stay sober too. I copied this "I feel bad today, that I can't just be normal" to past because it reminds me of another supportive mindset which I got here a couple years ago which sits at the top of my daily awareness tool box. It is, "being sober is normal" That helped(s) me alot when I come across old memories of what it was like then and how it is now.
I agree with everyone on this one. You can still have fun in sobriety, regardless. So relax and enjoy. Yeah, there are certain stipulations to keep in mind, but not on freedom. I have attended parties, marriage ceremonies and even concerts while in sobriety -some in bars and other drinking establishments, but I didn't feel like drinking though. I was there to have fun, period. And let's face it...drinking isn't fun for us anymore, now is it? The last time I had a drink, I almost drove my car under the wheels of a tractor trailer. Does that sound like fun to you? Remember, we can still have fun today, only to a certain extent though -Alcohol not included, okay. Enjoy...
-- Edited by Mr_David on Tuesday 27th of March 2012 02:14:04 AM
to have to spend the rest of his life with me, never stopping in for some live music, which we used to love to do.
Oh gosh, being sober is not like that at all. You just need to give it some time - work the program. Make sobriety the priority right now - before you know it, you'll be able to go anywhere you want, whenever you want.
Funny thing with me and Kathy is now that there's no complusion to drink, the flip side is we both have less patience to be around it. When the band is done, cya and have fun, bye.
There is more fun in store for you than you can imagine. Have a look at page 100-103 BB ... "Assuming we are spritually fit (which you are already working on through the steps) we can do all sorts of things alcoholics are not supposed to do"... There is a great message in these pages. Not only is being sober normal, it can be incredibly good fun. " While you were drinking, you were withdrawing from life little by little. Now you are getting back into the social life of this world." Sure there is still work to be done to get into this position of safety, but what Dean and Jerry said will come to pass for you if you keep up that step work.
Aye. Glad you had a fun night. Just a nod to what the others said. You will get to a point where no place is off limits as long as you have a good reason to be there.
If you are going to a pub to watch a band then go do it. You'll know when you are ready, and you'll have a great night out.
If you are going to a pub because you are bored and you think hanging out there will pick you up... well, I reckon that's only going to end in tears.
As long as you question yourself about your motives and you are honest with the answer you give yourself you'll be fine.
Not just yet, but you'll know when you are ready. About that point you'll wonder where you ever found the time to drink anyway as you'll enjoying the million and one things a sober life has to offer.
