I've heard this recently at meetings and thought it would be a good topic to post here.
'You can be right or you can be happy, but you can't be both."
Prior to working The Program it was really important for me to be right.
I guess it was for selfish reasons and a way to boost my pride and ego. Simple, short lived pleasure, but certainly not long term happiness. The opposite of Ego deflation and humility. Today, it's gotten much better with the Grace of God and the power of AA. The motive to be right or win a useless argument has diminished, it's just not that important. The promises state:
We are going to have a new freedom and new happiness.
Fear of people will leave us
We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us
We will realize God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
I heard it a bit differently. "It's more important to be happy than it is to be right." I think I like that phrasing better because you can be both happy and right, but it some instances, you have to make a choice for one or the other. I don't think there is one "right" choice. In some cases, being right, if it concerns a life or death matter, may be more important than momentary happiness. I take the lesson from it as just being aware there is a choice in the matter and you are the one making it, for better or for worse.
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I think there's an invisible principle of living...if we believe we're guided through every step of our lives, we are. Its a lovely sight, watching it work.
I agree with Vixen about being Happy over being Right and sometimes you have choices to make. I no longer have the desire to win every battle, Nor does everything have to be a battle lol.
The promises have come true in allot of lives, and going to meetings gives me the oppurtunity to see more members recieve the gifts and promises that sobriety brings.
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"Never make someone a priority who makes you an option"
I have to get rid of the "Egomaniac with a Inferiority complex", for me this came about from working the steps and going to a lot of meetings.
We start to realize what is important in life and put our selfish ego on the shelf. "Our common welfare comes first". Put you're ego away for the good of family,relationships and group.
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Rob
"There ain't no Coupe DeVille hiding in the bottom of a Cracker Jack Box."
I don't get it. I am quite happy when I am right! I am not happy when I am wrong. If I am right about something and others don't like it--their problem, not mine. Same in reverse. I guess I don't understand what the "issue" is. I've heard the saying "Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy/" but it has never made sense to me.
I've heard that one myself and also have had my elder sponsor ask me the question along with many others in recovery..."Do you wanna be right or do you wanna be happy". I'm also a both person cause from experience you can be both or do both. One of my happiness and right tools is Dr. Pauls message on acceptance. I accept that I can be happy anytime I want cause its an inside job anyway. I also accept being right for me and being humble enough to let other's "right" add to mine. I'm right isn't exclusive...it was when I first got here...in recovery...and then there where so many other "rights" when I got an open mind looking for help.
