Hello. I am trying this before going to a real meeting. Guess I am hoping this online work will be what I need. My life from the outside appears normal, but inside, it's a mess. I've been drinking to escape my own mind and life for 10 yrs. I am tired of making excuses, and would like to see it, and talk about it for what it is for the first time ever. Yes I had a crappy childhood, but who doesn't. Yes, I had a traumatic experience 10 yrs ago which included finding a loved one had shot himself in the head and blamed it on me for leaving him. But really, it's just a disease isn't it? A really sucky one that is full of shame, guilt and hurt for yourself and those you love. I have a beautiful family, and that's how I want it to stay. A family. If I don't look this in the face, I could loose everything and everyone I love. I'm here because I need THIS KIND of help and support. I don't know anything about how this works yet, so I'm just here right now. Sober.
Hi Tasha, and welcome to the board. Lots of sober women here to talk to. Good choice on getting to AA meetings. This is good addition, but not a replacement for them.
Aloha Tasha...Yep were all around the planet. You are not alone and be patient one or more of the great sober women in MIP will jump in to greet you also.
I hear you saying about how much to have to loose and I'll just bet that you know you're loosing your spirit too. When I got into recovery there was nothing but a large, dark, deep hole and not enough alcohol on the planet to fill it up with. The sucking sound was horrendous and I didn't have much longer to live and then the miracle arrived. Funny...it was mostly women at the start that saved my butt.
Okay they will be here soon. (((((hugs)))))
Keep coming back and let us know how the meeting went. Depending on where you are at you might just meet one of us there.
Welcome, Tasha! :) I'm so glad you found MIP. The people here are awesome and the experience, strength and hope they share here has helped me stay sober and sane. The key though has been the face to face meetings I attend. I think you will find them invaluable in working the program and learning how to live a sober life. 90 meetings in 90 days, reading the Big Book, and getting a sponsor has been the foundation for many of us here. There is a solution, and AA has it.
All the very best to you and you don't ever have to drink again.
-- Edited by vixen on Friday 30th of December 2011 10:14:03 AM
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I think there's an invisible principle of living...if we believe we're guided through every step of our lives, we are. Its a lovely sight, watching it work.
Welcome Tasha, sounds like you made it to the right place.. The good news is that there's a solution for your drinking and living woes, the other good news is that you're not alone. Many of us have been where you are, we hurt, we're lonely, and we wanted to die inside. Most of the answers are in the book, but you can hear them live at a mtg too, go to as many meetings as you can, and surround yourself with sober people (women, especially now around New Years). Keep coming back Tasha, we can help you if you want it, and you can help someone else eventually, that's how it works.
Marc
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"Never make someone a priority who makes you an option"
Welcome Tasha :) I am fairly new here myself. I have found a lot of good information and comforting words here. I come here as a another source of support in addition to my in-person AA meetings. Vixen had some good advice, sometimes the warm hugs from people in the AA rooms are irreplaceable when we think we are so low there is no light. I have a hard time letting people into my personal space so it took me a long time to allow people to know me well enough to comfort me but thank God I did
Welcome Tasha. This board has been a big help to me, but face to face AA meetings are necessary for you. Using this alone would be a "half measure" and our literature advises against that. Go to a meeting (go to lots), get a sponsor, work the steps. The support you will get from actual meetings will be even greater than what you feel here (not that MIP isn't really great).
Keep us updated on your journey. We have all be where you are. I hate to see you struggle in fear when AA is at your disposal in more ways than just here. (and you really need those as much as you are afraid).
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
