Medical marijuana in recovery

SarahSox · Newbie

Medical marijuana in recovery

ANGELINA · Veteran Member

OH MY GOD I FEEL SO SORRY FOR YOU
...I DO NOT KNOW MUCH ABOUT THAT DRUG...BUT KNOW PEOPLE WHO TAKE IT FOR THE RELIEF OF PAIN...BUT NOT BE STONED ALL DAY!
THAT IS JUST SUBSTITUTING ONE DRUG FOR ANOTHER......FOR YOUR SOBRIETY,NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU LOVE HIM YOU HAVE TO THINK THINK THINK!
IF YOU ARE NOT OK..AS CLEARLY YOU ARE NOT AS YOU SOUND SO SAD...YOU ARE NO GOOD TO ANYONE!...
THERE ARE LEGAL MEDICINES THAT ARE USED TO TREAT CHRONIC ILLNESS...YOU DO NOT SAY WHAT IT IS....I HAVE A LIFE THREATENING ILLNESS BUT LIKE YOU I AVOID ANYTHING THAT WOULD SET OFF THE ADDICTION AGAIN.....OH GOD FORBID THAT WOULD HAPPEN TO ME!
AL ANON TELLS YOU...IF YOU HAVE AN ALCOHOL OR DRUG DEPENDANT PARTNER YOU EITHER HAVE TO ACCEPT IT..AND TRY TO LIVE A NORMAL DAILY LIFE.....OR LEAVE...ONLY TWO CHOICES!
REMEMBER THE FAMILY ARE THE ONES THAT BECOME SICKER THAN THE USER...AND YOU KNOW WERE THAT COULD LEAD!
A LOT OF PEOPLE IN AA QUOTE THE BIG BOOK ALL THE TIME AND ARE SO KNOWLEDGEABLE ABOUT IT ALL...OLD TIMERS GIVE SO MUCH BRILLIANT ADVICE...I JUST SEEM TO PICK OUT THE PARTS THAT I UNDERSTAND AS AFFECTING MY LIFE.
I WISH YOU ALL THE LOVE AND HOPE THAT YOUR SITUATION IS RESOLVED........LIFE IS HARD ENOUGH WITHOUT YOUR OWN ILLNESSES BEING AGGRAVATED!
I WILL BE PRAYING AND KEEPING UPDATE ON WHAT YOU DECIDE....
ANGELINA XOXO

happycamper · MIP Old Timer

Hmm, thats a tuffy, for sure!

What does your sponsor say?

Have you prayed about this?

Does b/f know how you feel?

You are the only one who can answer the question of rather or not you can date someone who isn't really ... you know, sober.

Alanon is good, very good. And it might help you deal with all of this.

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

A lot of fish in the sea. Personally I couldn't live with it.

rrib · Senior Member

StPeteDean wrote:
A lot of fish in the sea.

"Early recovery is a losey time to be getting into serious relationships", he says using his best voice of experience.

Why not swim around a bit? Have some fun and enjoy your A.A. honey-moon for awhile before setting yourself up.

Jerry F · MIP Old Timer

I've been around awhile and have watched and listened to others who were on and wanted to be on the Medical Marijuana Program. Watching and listening helped me alot and I decided "To thine own self be true" really works for my choices of who and where I want to be with. ((((hugs)))) smile

Fyne Spirit · MIP Old Timer

Well Sarahsox, almost everyone in AA will have a different definition of sobriety to yours, I would say. This is because we all grow at different rates. A man I sponsor at 15 months sobriety is miles ahead of some others I know with ten or fifteen years. My experience and observations over the years have been that the different rates of growth often lead to tension in a "AA relationship". One is doing too much AA, the other not enough, one is rigorously honest, the other has lesser standards, one is free of substances, the other is still experimenting. Who needs it, especially when there are better things in the world for you. I decided, after a particularly wild fling in very early sobriety, that AA was not the place to find a suitable life partner, one nutter in a relationship is enough! lol.

Seriously, there is no reason an alcoholic can't have a normal healthy realtionship with a normal non alcoholic person. In my experience, these relationships work out fine. I was young, single and lonely when I came into AA and I understand the sometimes overpowering instinct for security. But my sponsor use to tell me that when I was ready someone really special would come along, and in the meantime, don't settle for second best. I am so glad I took his advice - so many blessings came from it.

In respect to forming a relationship with someone in AA, the odds are good, but the goods are odd.

God bless,

Mike H.

pinkchip · MIP Old Timer

I agree with Fyne Spirit on this one. I could only date someone in AA for about 2 weeks before the mutual craziness reached catastrophic levels lol....and this was dating people with substantial time in the program too. It seems intuitive that you'd want to share recovery in your relationship, but in actuality, I find that being in a relationship with someone else in the program detracts from you making and keeping the program YOURS and also letting his progrm be HIS.

The success of your relationship now depends on how much you can let his program either work or not work for him while focusing on your own program.

I know one guy in AA who suffers from like 3 or 4 serious illnesses (part of me things he is also addicted to being sick but I know the illness are real)....Anyhow, he is always so doped up on painkillers...but he has been sober for over 15 years. For him, he's questioning his own motives and it's okay. I think if he could find a way, he'd rather not take all the pain pills. Also, I guess he still remains in recovery from being a fall down sloppy barfly drunk so that is a big change.

I don't know. There are no right answers here and much to consider. If this is something that is always going to bother you, I'd break it off now cuz you won't be able to change your feelings later either and you will be more entrenched in the relationship then.

Mark

SarahSox · Newbie

Thanks everyone for your input :) I will give some serious thought to all of your advice. This is WONDERFUL - I feel like I tabled the topic in a meeting, which is something I can't do here as it would break my bf's anonymity. We have been taking a break from each other to get everything back in perspective. He told me yesterday that he had flushed the rest of his stash...not exactly what I would have chosen to happen right now, but what's done is done. I realized last night while I was journaling that I have to give this problem to my HP. I can't predict the future - I can hear my old sponsor in my head saying "Sarah, do you have a crystal ball???" I don't know how the details of this will unfold, but I chose to believe that it will happen exactly the way it is supposed to. If I don't keep telling myself this I will drive myself even crazier. I'm in college - I need to be keeping my nose in the textbooks right now!
Even being able to say what is going on and "talk" to all of you has taken a weight off of my mind. I'm really grateful you took the time to respond to a first-time poster. This forum is great! Think I might stick around :)

SarahSox · Newbie

Ya, I have done all of those things...I suspect I'm just shopping around for someone who will either a) make up my mind for me or b) tell me what I secretly want to hear, which is "go ahead and stay with him, if you love him enough it will all work out!" And I KNOW that is not true from past personal experience. I just have to keep trying to pray, pray, pray! Thank you! smile

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

Sarah, one thing to consider is that relationships are optional. Between your sobriety and your school, that's too huge priorities, and hopefully your keeping them in perspective, as in, more important than the relationship. One thing that helped me, in regards to making important decisions involving big goals (like staying sober or graduating from colege) is to ask if this certain activity (your relationship) is taking you closer to your goals or moving you away from them. Your answer may be in there.

-- Edited by StPeteDean on Tuesday 11th of October 2011 01:14:03 PM

Mr_David · MIP Old Timer

StPeteDean wrote:
Sarah, one thing to consider is that relationships are optional. Between your sobriety and your school, that's too huge priorities, and hopefully your keeping them in perspective, as in, more important than the relationship. One thing that helped me, in regards to making important decisions involving big goals (like staying sober or graduating from colege) is to ask if this certain activity (your relationship) is taking you closer to your goals or moving you away from them. Your answer may be in there.

-- Edited by StPeteDean on Tuesday 11th of October 2011 01:14:03 PM

Amen Dean...well said. No one can achieve anything in sobriety with a huge monkey on our back. I'd make the responsible choice for both myself and my long term goals.

I'm not suggesting you dump this guy, but I would keep all options available if need be. I hope your able to work out whatever differences you have and are both able to enjoy sobriety for many years to come.

HEB · Newbie

Helen Burke I think that ingesting ANYTHING (pharmaceutical or otherwise) in sobriety should be approached with extreme caution if that substance is mood/mind altering. In order to achieve true sobriety, it has been my experience that it is difficult to learn healthy ' healthy coping skills' without a clear head. when I was smoking weed I was anything but clear headed and my perception of life was skewed/altered. Having said that, there are more holistic and effective methods of dealing with chronic illness that do not involve any sort of medication., Exploring these alternatives is important, in my opinion, in order to safeguard my sobriety and my life.

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

Hello Helen and welcome to the board.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Welcome to MIP Helen ... glad you're here!