Just one of a million tales of love....Al,was a very talented man who lost his young son from acute appendicitis that Al thought he should have recognized and never got over the guilt odf not taking his son to the hospital.....He started drinking and became Alcoholic.His wife shortly after left him and as we are all aware how the devastation of our illness continues to spiral downwards through our active years of addiction..Al died alone in a motel room. There was much judgement and disdain displayed for that "alcoholic"and mutterings of what a waste he was.Years later, one of the most kind,caring men came along and we watched him with his children.This man was Al's other son. Ernie,as he was called, never really spoke of his father,he felt it was kind of hard to defend an alcoholic...Ernie was asked,"I know your father was really the only one who raised you,what did he do that you became so special?? Ernie said, from my earliest memories as a child until I left home at 18, my father would come into my room ,give me a kiss and say 'I love you son"!.. When we judge and view others as failures from our standpoints we may not know the legacy of love that can affect someone elses lives.I wanted to share this because I remember holding onto over 30 years of guilt as my mid 40 year old children were taken away to another state and it wasnt until I made a complete, to the best of my ability ,8th and then 9th Step I remember both of my children saying .Dad ,you definitely had some issues but you were the best father you could be to us, we have grown stonger from the love you were able to give in your "battle" I am crying now, tears of happiness and gratitude that I was able to come full circle and made it a little farther than Al.......There is always hope,we put down the substance,we reach for that Higher Power and we do the work it takes to be all God intended us to be. Just For Today I am truly blessed and grateful, my heart is full of God's grace and mercy and I keep it strong by sharing it with others....Have a blessed and productive day!!!
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
Thanks for sharing that. I have been judgemental of my ex husband who did not meet MY standards as a good husband and one who could do better as a father in my eyes. He is in the madness. But after reading this it sure humbles me and lets me see that he does the best he knows how. I know that my daughters feel loved by him and isnt that all that matters. I am so tired of my judgements of other people. Wow, I can feel it being lifted as I write this. I humbly ask my higher power to take my character defects. I no longer want them or need them. Thanks Mikef
Mikef/Susie ... I found some comfort in your notes tonight... I know my kids were raised with an alcoholic dad AND mom... We divorced when our son was 20 and daughter 10.... Now ... 10 years later I have stopped drinking. Of course, we don't live together or even near each other anymore... I hope that they cam look back and see some positive in their childhood... I know I really thought I was doing the best I could... I only wanted the best for them... And still do. We spend time together, and speak... I pray every day they are ok and don't follow in our footsteps....
