This isn't a request for advice or anything, I just wanted to share (VENT!!) on something that's been happening lately.
I'm grateful to have gotten pretty comfortable in bars. I live in a major urban area and all my friends have tiny apartments, so group get-togethers usually take place at a neighborhood bar out of pure convenience. I'm OK with that because I'm now used to going to a bar and not drinking -- I'm usually the first one there, get my favorite drink (club soda with a splash of cranberry and a lime), visit for a bit and then leave by the time everyone has had a couple of drinks and gets less interesting. :) A few of my friends choose not to drink for various reasons, and everyone knows I am sober, so I never feel "weird" or pressured.
Anyway, my issue is that one of my friends is pregnant. Now almost EVERY time we are at a bar, she starts up a detailed discussion about how much she misses being able to have a drink, wanting to smell someone's beer, looking forward to just being able to have a beer with friends again when she is done breastfeeding, etc. She's a very light drinker anyway so I'm surprised she is even making that big of a deal about it. I usually excuse myself from the conversation but sometimes (like last night) I can't because we are seated and I'm stuck, for example, in the middle of a bench seat. Listening to someone wax rhapsodic about their favorite beers is incredibly grating (I used to be a big Belgian beer aficionado).
It doesn't trigger me, but it's just annoying. I don't feel comfortable bringing it up to her because she's not really being insensitive (it's not all about ME!) and she's a very sweet person and would feel bad -- plus, it's a time-limited problem and I'd rather just suck it up. I just REALLY look forward to the day when she can have that beer and shut up about it!! :)
I wonder why it is the lightweight drinkers who complain the most when they can't drink?
I was at a gathering recently and a 60-something woman at my table was bragging about how she was retired and was gonna drink as much as she wanted. Which seemed to be maybe... a drink and a half. LOL. I don't think we alkies realize until we stop drinking and hang around normal people that the world is made up largely of lightweights.
As more time goes by, it will soon become one of those deals where it is like people are just discussing a topic you have no input on. It will be boring for you but not so annoying. At least that is how it has gone for me. Was listening to a long converstation between friends at dinner last night about wine and how good the wine they were having was after it had aired for a bit and where it came from and wine this and wine that. All I have to share about wine is "Yeah, I used to drink 4 bottles of wild irish rose" a night." So rather than contributing that, I just chewed my ice and drank my diet sprite :) Yawn.
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As more time goes by, it will soon become one of those deals where it is like people are just discussing a topic you have no input on. It will be boring for you but not so annoying. At least that is how it has gone for me. Was listening to a long converstation between friends at dinner last night about wine and how good the wine they were having was after it had aired for a bit and where it came from and wine this and wine that. All I have to share about wine is "Yeah, I used to drink 4 bottles of wild irish rose" a night." So rather than contributing that, I just chewed my ice and drank my diet sprite :) Yawn.
I agree...most conversations that center around alcohol are kind of boring anyhow. I would try to obstain from indulging that conversation any further as well. Bottom line...
-- Edited by Mr_David on Friday 12th of August 2011 12:12:47 AM
I was thinking the same thing, Rob, she might be looking for some attention.
Twenty-some years ago, I did a little of that too. Selfish, self-centered crap, woe is me, blah, blah, blah. Privately, I absolutely loved being pregnant, I never felt more beautiful. You might ask her the same.
Reminds me of the kid who falls off his bicycle, dusts himself off, walks his bike back home, goes into his house and THEN starts screaming to his mother about the pain, lol..... When nobody is around to hear it, why bother, right?! You gotta save the drama for the right audience, hahaha
Praise God, I don't have to live like that anymore.
