The chief activator of our defects has been self-centred fear. . . .
Twelve Steps And Twelve Traditions, p. 76
When I feel uncomfortable, irritated, or depressed, I look for fear. This "evil and corroding thread" is the root of my distress: Fear of failure; fear of otherrs' opinions; fear of harm, and many other fears. I have found a Higher Power who does not want me to live in fear and, as a result, the experience of A.A. in my life is freedom and joy. I am no longer willing to live with the multitude of character defects that characterised my life while I was drinking. Step Seven is my vehicle to freedom from these defects. I pray for help in identifying the fear underneath the defect, and then I ask God to relive me of that fear. This method works for me without fail and is one of the great miracles of my life in Alcoholics Anonymous.
. . . And Letting Go Of It.
... primarily fear that we would lose something we already possessed or would fail to get something we demanded. Living upon a basis of unsatisfied demands, we were in a state of continual disturbance and frustration. Therefore, no peace was to be had unless we could find a means of reducing these demands. The difference between a demand and a simple request is plain to anyone.
Twelve Steps And Twelve Traditions, p. 76
Peace is possible for me only when I let go of expectations. When I'm trapped in thoughts about what I want and what should be coming to me, I'm in a state of fear or anxious anticipation and this is not conducive to emotional sobriety. I must surrender - over and over - to the reality of my dependence on God, for then I find peace, gratitude and spiritiual security.
A.A. Thought for the Day
We had become hopelessly sick people, spiritually, emotionally, and physically. The power that controlled us was greater than ourselves - it was John Barleycorn. Many drinkers have said: "I hadn't gone that far; I hadn't lost my job on account of drink; I still had my family; I managed to keep out of jail. True, I took too much sometimes and I guess I managed to make quite an ass of myself when I did, but I still thought I could control my drinking. I didn't really believe that I was an alcoholic." If I was one of these, have I fully changed my mind?
Meditation for the Day
Painful as the present time may be, you will one day see the reason for it. You will see that it was not only testing, but also a preparation for the life work, which you are to do. Have faith that your prayers and aspirations will some day be answered. Answered in a way that perhaps seems painful to you but is the only right way. Selfishness and pride often make us want things that are not good for us. They need to be burned out of our natures. We must be rid of the blocks, which are holding us back, before we can expect our prayers to be answered.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may be willing to go through a time of testing. I pray that I may trust God for the outcome.
