My condolences, Halfwolf, on the passing of your friend. We are here to support you and offer up words of encouragement if need be.
The death of an alcoholic is never in vain. The prospect of losing a member of our extended family is always painful but in no way coincidental. The reasons behind our struggles in life and in death still remain a mystery but the message of hope and freedom will continue on -despite our losses.
What is important though, other than staying sober ourselves, is allowing the message of hope and the prospect of continuous sobriety bring a smile to the sick and suffering alcoholics who need hear this message -All done, of course, in their memory- one day at a time.
~God Bless~
P.S. Today...we have choices -like you said, and I choose to stay sober and connected, remaining true to myself and my sobriety. I hope others are able to do likewise -one day at a time.
-- Edited by Mr_David on Friday 24th of June 2011 10:04:13 PM
Sorry for your loss Halfwolf. It is so sad to see where we could have been or could be without the 12 steps. Thank you for posting this to help us all reflect on what we have today. Tom
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
I understand. It is the hardest choice, truly. It is the most blessing that I was and I am a chicken. When an Alk has realized the bottle does not work anymore, God is several hours away, he has already isolated himself and the weight of life is bearing down on him, why not? Why not end this? I understand.
God sent me a young addict to my life last year. He does not come in to the rooms any more. His father committed suicide when he was 9. He is 32 now. He is messed up, a little more than most of us. I could only imagine what father's suicide does to a child. By the nature of an Alk, I do not think I am capable of summon the responsibility to stop myself at that point. I hope I would never put myself into the spot your friend was at.
For a recovering Alk, I do not think I have 4 choices. I have 2. I have will to live. Doing my best, somedays, my best fall short. I want to see my 5 year old son become a man. He is the harvest of all my dreams. I want to see the Great barrier in down under. I hope to be a self righteous old timer in my home group someday. I want to see how my life unfolds. I hope I never forget it can not rain all day.
For us, pain is our best friend, I think. Without it, I do not need the Sunlight. I do not seek. I do not know how your friend embrace his death, but I am sure he is not hurting any more. I hope you don't neither. I am sorry for your loss.
Thanks for the kind words and you right long walk there is only 2 choices for me anyway stay sober or drink and die. My friend Mark was the 3rd member of his family to commit suicide because of this disease.
May the Good Lord help us and guide us and give us strength.
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The smallest of good deeds is greater than the best of intentions.
Anonymous
Sorry for you loss Halfwolf. I've lost quite a few of my friends, in and out of the proqram. The lonqer that you stay sober, the more bodies you have to step over. It's like climbinq Mt. Everest. My qratitude statement "better them then me". It's a selfish proqram. Today I choose to live.
Sorry for your loss! I too lost my best friend,my brother,1978 december 17th, self inficted bullet to the head,the night we parted from a bender..He chose another way out.....my heart still cries...............
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
