Last night guy shared that yes he drank on the weekend cause he was bored.In one statement he knew where this would lead him and what he had to lose(on Parole,has a 12 year old child,decent job even with Felony record)but the illness was telling him all the lies we know about, its only a few,you work hard all day,relax,its only this or that ,thought the God' thing was bull----...A visual of someone not in utter defeat or incorporating emotional acceptance of total surrender.There was the usual giving out of names on a list to call, hugs, talk of "keep coming back"but we know that we can be dipped in oil, prayed over,given therapy ,accupuncture,meditation etc but until that desire to admit and surrender takes hold(whether thru pain or revelation)we can only sit and think"man ,thank ,my Higher Power for my willingness to do 'whatever it takes" to find this new way to live a day at a time,free from active addiction..Can we say truly blessed. gives me chills seeing myself sitting there oh so long ago but just like yesterday!Thank you dear God for your grace and mercy.....
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
Mike, thank you for the reminder. Being bored was/is an emotional trap for me. I have to be careful with that one. Sometimes it can lead to self pity, low self esteem and worthlessness if I'm not vigilant. I drank many times, just because I was bored. I to can relate to the total surrender line. I was told repeatedly in early sobriety to just surrender already........ you are powerless. I've learned we each have our own fight in us and it takes what it takes to surrender. Sometimes quickly- sometimes slowly......
I'm grateful today I have tools at my disposal to fend off the boredom trap. Today, being bored is often times o.k. I grow tired of choas in my life. There's been plenty of that in the past.
I tell you, one thing that really cinches it for me, is that you CANNOT find ANYBODY on the internet, in any forum or anything, that claims to have returned to normal drinking after drinking alcoholically. It's either "I relapsed and now I'm worse than before" or dead silence.
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Render unto Caesar that which is Caesar's, and unto God that which is God's.
@ ZZ.................. I agree with your research. Although I have met an AA'er who fights the craving every time he drinks to be able to say he can have a couple. Jeez , wouldn't it just be easier to abstain.
Mike your meeting and what you brought back from it is my best meeting for today. I'm glad you brought it back along with your memories of the past. This post will kick the butt of my compulsion for today. I will read it again and again until it's gone from my head to my heart to my gut. Thanks much brother for going to that meeting and bringing it back.
Last night guy shared that yes he drank on the weekend cause he was bored.In one statement he knew where this would lead him and what he had to lose(on Parole,has a 12 year old child,decent job even with Felony record)but the illness was telling him all the lies we know about, its only a few,you work hard all day,relax,its only this or that ,thought the God' thing was bull----...A visual of someone not in utter defeat or incorporating emotional acceptance of total surrender.There was the usual giving out of names on a list to call, hugs, talk of "keep coming back"but we know that we can be dipped in oil, prayed over,given therapy ,accupuncture,meditation etc but until that desire to admit and surrender takes hold(whether thru pain or revelation)we can only sit and think"man ,thank ,my Higher Power for my willingness to do 'whatever it takes" to find this new way to live a day at a time,free from active addiction..Can we say truly blessed. gives me chills seeing myself sitting there oh so long ago but just like yesterday!Thank you dear God for your grace and mercy.....
By the Grace of God go I. Thanks...for reminding me of that.
-- Edited by Mr_David on Thursday 28th of April 2011 12:37:11 AM
