Ill be honest, im only on day 2 myself. And other than one aquaintance passing that I knew from AA, this is the first time I have to deal with this, Im not going to drink over it and this may be the final wake up I need. I am just so distraught. I dont know what to think. I was close with him most my life. Not lately but still hurts to know that could easily be me. Just venting and looking for some support. Im still in shock.. Apparantely he told a relative last night he was going to quit drinking and that relative said well you wanna go with to AA with me and then I guess they found him dead today, not sure if it was from withdrawals (do they kick in that fast) or if he went on another bender, either way its a shock and eyeopener.. Please send prayers if you can, my mom (his sister) is breaking down as I type this.. R.I.P. Terry
__________________
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
Thanks Jerry F, this is the worst feeling to know that the disease I shared with him took him out. We had so much in common including this horrible serious disease.
__________________
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
I relate...my cousin was my alcoholic sponsor...taught me alot about drinking and it almost killed me. I found out he tried AA and didn't stick. He found out I got sober in AA and it did. He supported my sobriety until the day he died from this disease. Wasn't pretty. They're over on HP's side now.
My dad died of alcoholism (his death certificate actually says so) and three of his five brothers died of conditions that could have been related to alcoholism although I didn't know any of them well enough to be sure. One uncle on my mother's side has experienced a recent relapse that landed him in what could have been a one way trip to assisted living with dementia, although he is back to himself for the moment. He's the only one of the bunch I ever actually drank with, although it was a long long time ago... actually this dates me, we were watching the 1976 Republican national convention on TV. He was in town visiting... he was 41, I was 18.
A friend in AA drank himself to death last year, and that one was hard on me - because we were good friends, not just acquaintances. Another guy that I gave rides to meetings back in the early 90s drank himself to death around 2001. The guy reminded me a LOT of my dad. He was a pretty likeable guy actually, but he lost everything to the disease, including, ultimately his life. When I look back, it seemed to me that he never got step 2. Step 1, he got - but he never came to believe, even if he strung together months or even a year without drinking - he just lost the will to live. Like my dad, he placed conditions on his sobriety.... quit drinking for a month and see if he gets back the wife, the kids, the job, the car... he didn't, so he drank himself to death.
But for the grace of God... I don't know why I am sober and alive today. I think too much, I have too much self will, I don't follow directions, and most things I've ever tried to accomplish, I didn't stick with. But I did come to believe, and came to love the AA way of life. Sobriety is contagious!
Sorry to hear of your loss brother (Steve). Another reminder that we're dealing with a deadly diesase. This fall a fellow brother from The Program passed on. He and I became friends and golfed together. A really nice guy. Had some sobriety and was working The Program for awhile. Life was getting good for him. He ran into some trouble: finances and relationships. He relapsed and pride stood in the way of asking for help. They found him in a local river face down dead. A bottle of Vodka and his bike near by. My Sponsor reminds me the longer we stay sober the more we'll hear about people who just couldn't stay and work The Program. We just hope and pray that it's not us.
Prayers for your family. Your staying sober would be the greatest honor and gift you could give him and the best way to honor his memory.
My uncle was also an alcoholic but died with like 20 years sober in AA. He died before I came into AA. I always wish I had him around to talk to now...
-- Edited by pinkchip on Monday 28th of February 2011 10:28:40 PM
__________________
Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
My condolences, steve, on the passing of your uncle. We are here to support you and offer up words of encouragement in your hour of need.
The death of an alcoholic is never in vain. The prospect of losing a member of our extended family is always painful but in no way coincidental. The reasons behind our struggles in life and in death still remain a mystery but the message of hope and freedom will continue on -despite our losses.
Whether you're uncle died sober or not is not the issue and certainly would not bring him back; what is important though, other than remembering him as he would like us too, is allowing the message of hope and the prospect of continuous sobriety bring a smile to the sick and suffering alcoholics who need hear this message -All done, of course, in your uncles memory- one day at a time.
~God Bless~
"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies". ~The Shawshank Redemption~
-- Edited by Mr_David on Friday 4th of March 2011 05:09:12 PM
