fortunately for me, I am a woman, I CAN change my mind. Kidding of course.
Now here is what has been going on in my little sober life, one day at a time.
Was diagnosised with a fairly new form of Lung Cancer, in late September, and from then til now, have gone thru every conceivable test, first for the surgery, that was ruled out, then to chemo, that was also ruled out and the last one Radiation for the removal.....the jury is coming back on that next week.
(interesting thing I read was that exposure to a lot of Radiation was a not a good idea, well they have had me go through every friggen imaginable test, almost without exception, all were levels of radiation) just make you wonder)
So yes I am "out of sorts today" not most of the time, I try to just put it out of my thoughts, and Pray, ask GOD to take it and he usually does. Think I forgot to ask today, yep, now I am certain.
I had made a decision that I as not going to post about this, too...........I dont know,............too something.
Love all of you, and yes, as a matter of fact, I just did ask God to remove the worry, and HE has.....
Sending Prayers to all of you.
Tonicakes
-- Edited by Just Toni on Monday 31st of January 2011 07:17:04 PM
You have no idea how grateful I am for your post... here I am, sitting here feeling sorry for myself because I've had the flu... haven't been able to get to a meeting for 5 days and all day, I've been longing to hear that Higher Power is still alive and well....
I'm so sorry that you are out of sorts today... but to me, you are full of HP's grace. I am soooo inspired. I never would have imagined someone who calls herself "Tonicakes" to ever have a care in the world....
The program looks beautiful on you ((((Tonicakes))))
Tony, hi my dependence on god in the face of calamidy. Not always easy to do. When I surrender all my problems to him. I have been thru. A lot this past year.not cancer ! But health issues and after all the pen and paper.and all the dumping it at my home group or with my support group. He continues to match calamity with serenity. Always always always. I was talking to a friend of mine the other day. And this is what thought came to mind.it was as if I was standing in the center of a funnel cloud and my entire life was spinnibg aroung me. Situatuons and circustances. But silence.! No need to reach to try to. Fix it.just an overwhelming sense of trust. And peace of mind. Like be still and know that He is God. I pray for you and your loved ones to feel his love and comfort. I continue to rely on the only thing that will keep me sober. One of my guys is on chemo . And I will continue to serve him .and I have faith that god is gonna get him thru . I have no doubt his will. Not mine be done.when I had ti take shots in my stomach he removed that rear to .as much as I would surrender to him any way.I hope you feel better..
I love you, we all do, and I hold you up to our Higher Power's care today. Just know that you continue to save lives here on MIP by staying sober, each and every day. And you are a true fighter, I admire you for that.
Love and many many ((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))), Joni Baloni
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
Hey Toni, Hope all goes well and massive prayers to you! It is amazing how you got your diagnosis so soon after my wife got hers. She is doing well due to YOUR prayers so they are coming back your way. XXX Tom
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
