Pink elephants swirling all around like spun cotton candy until you hit the ground. The Pink cloud descends and knocks you off your feet, buoyed in a cocoon of complacency, inactivity and deceit.
I fell off my pink cloud with a thudElizabeth Taylor
I came into the rooms of recovery, hopeless, hapless and friendless, more dead than alive. I cried, and was consoled that there was a solution to the worst I had ever known. As an outcast of unique circumstance, I was told I wasnt alone. I was invited in with moles, warts, acne, and all, and I felt welcomed, accepted, and right at home. The meetings became my life line, my salvation, and my relief. I spilled my guts my pain seemed to dissipate in a sea of empathy and understanding.The laughter at first seemed alien an absurd my misery would have none of it. And at some such meeting I caught a laugh, it had been such a long, long time since I smiled that I thought my sides would split in half.
An attitude of gratitude is a prayer unto God
The common themes in the meetings were gratitude and thanksgiving no matter what the topic spin. Every meeting starts with, a moment of silence followed by the serenity prayer then the preamble of how it works, and that God was in charge of the lost and the found, followed hard upon by the topic and then commenced by the sincerest, humblest, outrageous, humorous spiritual and at times grandiose personal shares. At the close we celebrate milestones in lengths of sobriety, and we close with a communal benediction in the form of a prayer.
The pink cloud is descending and with it an overwhelming sense of security, hope and wellbeing, an easier softer way has been found. All the direct and indirect consequences and pain of drinking and drugging start at once to disperse as we continue to talk it out.
Take the cotton out of your ears, put it in your mouth, sit down and shut up
The old timers accolade
Learning to drive sober as the judge has granted vehicular mercy, the return of the prodigal son or daughter to the family, the edgy divorce put on pause, your employer reassured that you have come to your senses. I even started working the Twelve Steps with a sponsor as suggested, they are admitted to be simple but not easy, not easy means it is hard work. The A.A. two Step quickly ensues Step one, Step two ,Step three ,well I am not willing to turn over my recovery life, so it back to Step two. My sponsor asks when you are going to work Step Four I am going to the meetings, lots of meetings, and I am staying sober, is that not enough?
The Big Book says We feel a man is unthinking when he says that sobriety is enough, Page 82 paragraphs 3.
Time takes time and I stayed quite dry but at the very least not high. My sponsor would then and again suggest until I worked the Steps the promises would not come true in my life. I experience many of lifes tragedies including the loss of children and when life on lifes terms put me into enough pain once again I finally did the work that is simple but not easy and it has made all the difference. My understanding is that you approach the newcomer when they pick up their desire chip and ask if they have had enough, are they willing to go to any lengths to achieve sobriety and with the two affirmatives I give them Clancys 7 questions and tell them that you need them back tomorrow and you expect their call, simple instruction that puts the newcomer and you into action and puts the pink cloud where it belongs right next to the pie in the sky and just below the yellow gold brick road..
The promises continue to come true in my life and I have found a direction and opportunity to be of maximum service to God and my fellows.
