When did you first get your start on a "spiritual awakening"?

SoberSteve · MIP Old Timer

When did you first get your start on a "spiritual awakening"?

ferrisdp · Senior Member

Steve, for me I was struggling with step 3, not really understanding what it meant to turn my will over to a higher power. I was on vacation on Cape Cod this past July, about 5 months in to recovery. I was sitting on the deck over-looking the bay early one morning and I just started praying, saying over and over "I give myself over to you, do with me what you want, I'm here for you." Something just happened -- I got chills and felt "something". That was the start for me, I knew then that I could turn my will over, it was possible because it happened in that moment. I figured if I felt that connection once it could happen again. I still use that moment today to remember.

leeu · MIP Old Timer

There is a God-shaped vacuum at the heart of every man which cannot be satisfied by any created thing, but only by God himself. Blaise Pascal

A.A. translation: We have a spiritual awakening as THE result of taking each of the steps, in order, as written, with all the honesty we can muster.

We start on the journey of a spiritual awakening when we genuinely take the first step, and then the next, and then the next, and the next, and so on. Half measures avail us NOTHING. The is no softer, easier way. We are willing to go to any lengths.

zzworldontheweb · Senior Member

I would say as soon as I read the twelve steps and understood what they meant. They were so close to the spiritual principles that I'd been learning my whole life that they were instantly familiar. I had always thought these types of things were just rules we were supposed to live by because that's what good people did. But I had never considered that they could have the primary benefit of changing ME. I had it in reverse. These things, living meekly, not taking offense, admitting when I was wrong, making amends to those I hurt, these things were not just things done by people that WERE ALREADY good. These things MAKE ONE BETTER by doing them.

pinkchip · MIP Old Timer

I never got hit like a bolt of lightening. Something major set in right when I committed to going to AA to begin with. Just admitting I had a problem and needed help was a huge spiritual awakening. It was an awakening when I realized alcohol had killed all spirituality I once had. It was an awakening when when I went to that first meeting and felt so at home and that I finally did something right after a very long string of screw ups. Along the last 2 years and 3 months there have been several other little spiritual awakenings. These things all took time. This is why step 2 says "Come to believe" and not "Already believed when we came into the program." I had to gradually do some work, gradually accept things, and then God sort of revealed himself to me in ways that let me know he was there all along.

I also had an awakening when I realized that there was never going to be logical proof of God and that I was wasting time trying to use reason to explain what is spiritual. Faith is believing in something that you do not have full proof of. I had faith for the first time in my life when I walked into AA all broken and crying and said I didn't know where else to go, but I knew I needed to be there. From that point, my faith has steadily evolved. Now I have spiritual awakenings when I realize that life is so much better when I live the program as best I can. The best spiritual awakenings for me are when I realize the promises have come true. I can solve problems that used to baffle me. I am less self-seeking. I am no longer afraid of everything.. Those are all spiritual things to me because I used to just hear those promises again and again in meetings and think they were the "promises for everyone but me." Only God could have played a hand in that because I was very much headed towards destruction prior to this.

So, don't expect to be hit by lightening or to fall down and start speaking in tongues. It is my opinion that God reveals himself more and more to me as I stay sober, attempt to do the right thing (his will) and just stay open minded. Hope this sinks in. You don't have to struggle with this Steve. More will be revealed if you just trust the process of the program and of recovery. No matter what else, believe that AA works, it's going to work for you and when it does...That is when you will go "How the hell did I get to this point??!!" Then you just might say "I guess it was God." If it could happen for me, it can happen for you.

Mark

Aquaman · MIP Old Timer

Lee's first quote is spot-on. Addiction is a God-shaped hole.
(Oh....welcome back, BTW)

My first "touched-back" was during my first attempt to relapse. I was four days in the program and already sick of it. I had two 40's of Ice House on the counter and when I opened my wallet for the cash...my 24 hour chip fell out onto the counter.

I looked up at Carol, my bait-beer-smokes-lotto ticket lady and she said "coffee is free today for 'friends'."

At least at that point I knew that there was something bigger than me, it wanted me sober, and I was just swimmin' through it's world.

Thanks for coming back, Friend. We left a light on for ya.

Peace,
Rob

ferrisdp · Senior Member

pinkchip wrote:
I also had an awakening when I realized that there was never going to be logical proof of God and that I was wasting time trying to use reason to explain what is spiritual.

This was a critical step in my recovery. Like many of us, I was in my head waaay too much on this step early on. We do tend over-analyze. Once I accepted this, turning my will over was relatively easy. Not always, but it brought some peace.

LinBaba · MIP Old Timer

SoberSteve wrote:

Ive heard many stories, some got it the first day they were sober, others after 6 months or a year clean, some only after doing the steps, curious to know when yours was and what happened?

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps

Click Me

-- Edited by LinBaba on Sunday 16th of January 2011 11:44:12 PM

bikerbill · MIP Old Timer

12th Step says 'having had a spiritual awakening as THE result of these steps.......'

That's when I really got mine. No bells, flutes or whistles. No blinding flashes of light, no sonic booms. I didn't even realise i had had a spiritual awakening until it was pointed out to me.

I thought I had had them before - but that was just wishful thinking and the door to a new way of life opening up a little bit more.

What was my spiritual awakening? just like it says in the book - a personality change sufficient to bring about recovery from the hopeless condition of mind and body...... but I also know that this recovery is on a daily repreive basis and is dependant upon living, loving and feeling the steps, as written, to the best of my ability on a daily basis.

I am still sicker on some days than on others.