Its ok. I vented. I got it out. Went to a meeting. Talked with a sponsor. I guess the whole thing just sucked me dry.
Even tho I feel the way I feel, this isnt about me. I trusted. I gave of myself, fully. I cared. I put myself out there for someone else. And thats what giving is all about. That doesnt always mean that things are going to turn out the way I wish them too.
I did the best I could.
This person contributed to my life, if only for a short time. There was laughter, joy, support. and love. Im grateful to them for that.
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There was a time when I was incapable of giving. It was all take, take, take. Just grateful that that has turned around, through this program of change.
I have no control over other peoples thoughts, actions, and choices. They are free to live their own lives, any way they wish to.
I had expectations that were real. They went for a crap. I put those expectations there, and even tho others contributed to those expectations, I am fully responsible for them, on my part.
They arent to blame for how I feel. They are going through some difficult times. I was there for them, Im glad that I could be. They were there for me also, and if Im completely honest about it. Im still there for them, in any way I can be.
I apoligize for letting all that pain stuff, out on this board. I just had to get it out, and this board has been a way of doing that, over the past few hundred days.
In no manner, it was meant to put another down. They are human too, and dont deserve to be put down, in any way, whatsoever.
Theyve gone through hurt, pain, and adjustments, in their lives, and they deserve everything good. I ask God to watch over them--be with them--and show them the way--with love.
Gotta get back to taking care of me, and thats a full time job, in itself.
Healing from some of this stuff doesnt happen in one day. I wish one could just snap the fingers and that would happen--it just doesnt.
We carry on, doing the best we can--and yes-we carry on giving of ourselves to others, when we can, also. Life is short.
It is in giving that we receive.
You guys have given to me--I give back. Thats what its all about.
Thanks for being here-have a good day.
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Easy Does it..Keep It Simple..Let Go and Let God..