I dont know what to do never been sober on my birthday or christmas. I dont know how to act or what to do. Part of me is screaming its your birthday. U can party just this once but i know better cuzthe first drop i drink i turn into a whole other person and i dont want to be her anymore. Ive been doing so good and i have people that support me but dont fully understand. Help me.
first of all, happy birthday. Second, get in and stay in sober company. Third, go to a meeting and share that it's your birthday and you're sober. It might just help the next guy coming up who's wondering how to enjoy their first sober birthday. Finally, speak to and meet your sponsor, speak with your higher power and be give thanks that you're sober today
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
If how I feel becomes more important than what I do IM SCREWED
BILLYJACK! I needed to hear this so bad today. I have had three days of emotional torture. Deep depression = the holidays, crap with my mother, crap with my daughter... blah blah blah... all sorts of 'excuses' to pick up. My emotions were getting stronger by the day... but I just kept going back to meetings and every time I did, I felt better. Then I'd get home to the SOS (Same old shit) and it was bringing the idea of a drink closer and closer.
I just keep praying. Looking forward to going back to work and normalcy. Too much time in the midst of all these 'feelings' is weakening my resolve. Praying is a huge part of staying away too.
But like you siad... when the emotions take over to a certain point, I am SCREWED! I am dangerously close.
In the midst of a blizzard and stuck home today. Gonna start my steps on my own. My new sponsor hasn't returned a call all weekend. Boo hoo.
Got hot chocolate? Sometimes "Keep it simple, sweetheart" works for me when I'm over-revved. You wrote "gonna start my steps on my own"... well, yeah...they gotta be YOUR steps to take. Sponsors can help, certainly, but one not being available doesn't have to stop you in your tracks. In fact, maybe that's for the best, so you can confront the first step on your own?
When I was 10 month sober, all I could think about was how bad I wanted to get to a year. I was psyched and no stupid birthday was going to deter me. You are going to have lots of birthdays and you can't be plastered for them any more. That is for kids.
Seriously, who gets super wasted on their birthday to the point of turning into an ass to all their friends and forgetting what happened on the one day that other people try and make special for you. That would be the epitome of selfish. On your birthday you will hear from people that care about you. You will hear birthday wishes all day long. Focus on that and not about checking out and self-destructing through drinking.
This and New Year's are really your last challenge til you make it a year. After that, you know there is not a single day of the year that can literally make you drink. Stay strong!
Mark
P.S. Seriously....Happy Birthday! Do some reflecting on how far you've come and I bet the desire to "party" and drink will go away.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
