I am new here I love the newness and all the information that is available from all the members.its fantastic.the coolest thing is speed to cross reference and cut and paste sames a lot of time.I miss the sound of my voice when I am sharing.narsasistic still. But like my regular groups I get tired of my own voice sick of me talking.information is great I need to share my experience and from the book back it up.when I was new all I and was information.but no solution.it was easy for me to tell you how great it was not drinking and first things first and ain't it grand to be sober.But when I was nine months sober and was ready to blow my brains out because me being just not drinking.I neede the experience of the guy who at mid night toke time out of his busy schedule and shared his expeirience and he told me how how he was spoon fed this and with his book and his forth step he shared his working knowledge and his first hand experience. I am willing to do the same.me knowing I was a drunk did not produce the power for me not to pick it up.please do not tell me that after all these years that I am different.self centered a little yes.I guess I am used to more than in a general way .anyone?
Bill, Yes, I agree. Self knowledge could not keep me sober. No human power could keep me sober. My wife, family or kids could not keep me sober. I tried Therapist and Counselors- didn't work. The diesase is stronger than I and for me the only defense was WE- AA & God.
Remember that we deal with alcohol, cunning, baffling, powerful! Without help it is too much for us. But there is One who has all power that One is God. May you find Him now!
Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. we asked His protection and care with complete abandon. Here are the steps we took:
For me; sobriety alone was not worth it. Sobriety and Recovery; with God and AA's help, has been worth it. They've changed the person who entered the rooms of AA. I now have a design for living so I don't have to go back to alcohol because my life is so good, I get daily relief from working the entire AA program. I now feel connected to me, others and God. It's a wonderful thing.
Meetings, Sponsor, Steps, HP & Service (including helping others).
Thank you God for the gifts and the lessons you provide.
Mental Defect wrote: I was nine months sober and was ready to blow my brains out because me being just not drinking. I needed the experience of the guy who at mid night took time out of his busy schedule and shared his expeirience and he told me how how he was spoon fed this and with his book and his forth step he shared his working knowledge and his first hand experience. I am willing to do the same. me knowing I was a drunk did not produce the power for me not to pick it up. please do not tell me that after all these years that I am different. self centered a little yes.I guess I am used to more than in a general way .anyone? ************************************************************* We are self centered, self glorified, unique in our own eyes, drunks.... sometimes we choose AA and an HP to help us be the people we are meant to be. loving, sober, helpful, recovering drunks. you are right where you need to be to grow and learn. you are willing to listen and do whatever it takes. a dry drunk (someone who just does not drink alcohol on his own) is a very miserable person (and suicidal). an alcoholic with a program has steps and a purpose to first learn and listen, then to share their experience strength and hope with other alcoholics. at AA meetings alcoholics can share "what works for them" and "tools" for getting through the tough times and the good times without alcohol. my AA friend has been "in and out" quite a few times in the past 5 years. i can see that it could be me at any time if i do not stick with whatworks for me. my dear friend has not had that big of a wake up call, yet..... she has not received the gift of desperation, yet. I pray that alcohol will not take her life before her real life begins. when i see my friend and she has drank before a meeting, i just thank God she is at a meeting and she is reaching out for help and her HP will be there when she is ready for the next step. in the mean time i will not judge her in any way, just love her and pray for her, because that is what brought me back 23 months ago, MY HP, AA friends and, of course, the CHP with red lights and sirens. "it takes what it takes" is not an excuse to keep drinking, it is part of one day at a time of getting to the place of willingness and desperation for sobriety. jj/sheila
I relate to much in these posts---sobriety alone not cutting it---self-knowledge being insufficient.
But the 12 steps also come packaged with a lot of knowledge that, when applied to living with this disease, is invaluable to sustaining remission and preventing relapse. I learned about the absolute need for "deflation at depth" (a friend of AA-Harry Tiebout, used the phrase when describing the reduction of ego (Edging God Out) required in order to receive the grace inherent in the Power greater than Self). I learned about essential self-care: heath, stress management, relationships and so forth. Knowledge gained about the foundations of A.A. and the rationale birthing each step, worded so precisely in order to convey knowledge to us. Knowledge alone is not enough, but knowledge "and" is unbeatable!
I tried every thing to fix myself, books, exercise, therapy treatment, bodywork, yoga, martial arts, controlled drinking(thought that was working-ha) and more. I'm a big seeker of knowledge, but when I realized the drinking was the root of my problems, I decided to give AA a try. For me, this has been THE life transforming action. It has addressed all my other life concerns and daily living is much better for it. Hard to quantify, it's amazing to me. This is the way for me, and I am baffled when I think about all the $$ and time I spent looking elsewhere, when this option was right out there. I am absolutely certain that if I had continued on the path I was on, death by d.u.i, prison, suicide or insane asylum were in my future, although I could not see that at first. So glad I found AA. I wish you the best and keep posting.
-- Edited by angelov8 on Wednesday 8th of December 2010 01:15:34 AM
I relate to much in these posts---sobriety alone not cutting it---self-knowledge being insufficient.