Steps 6&7

gonee · MIP Old Timer

Steps 6&7

Klaatu · Senior Member

Agreed. I read somewhere that we need to become truly humble as well. I've struggled with thinking my defects were getting worse, but what I was told (by my sponsor) was that maybe I'm just becoming more aware of them. God's way of helping me take my personal inventory and showing me what I still need to work on. Today, thankfully, the God of my 'limited' understanding doesn't condemn me for my defects, but desires to help me be rid of them. Thanks for the post gonee.

K.....

happycamper · MIP Old Timer

I really needed to read this post here this morning, thankyou.

I wasn't the kind of drunk sittin around the bar talking about character defects like .. anger, resentment, jealousy, etc.
Matter of fact, I didnt know what a character defect was until I came to AA.

Altho all the steps of AA are important, I really feel like steps 6 and 7 are the most important for me and ones that I need to continually work on.
Even tho the desire/compulsion to drink has been removed, my character defects havent been in the same way that the desire to drink has. And I need constant help with getting rid of the defects.
I know I have to be willing to have them be removed, and Im aware that I cant do it ... the step tells me who will be doing the removing and that is God. He is the One with the power, its certainly not me.

leeu · MIP Old Timer

I fall into the trap of thinking that "all" my shortcomings means every single one...but I have come to realize that it is only "all" of those that I am actually aware of...there seem to be some lurking deep under the surface that emerge later to still be dealt with! So, I just say "thank you, God", for keeping me busy! LOL

LinBaba · MIP Old Timer

"This is the step that seperates the men from the boys"

Wrote Father Dowling, a Catholic Priest who was mentoring Bill during the writing of the 12 and 12

Father Dowling's Story

-- Edited by LinBaba on Friday 15th of October 2010 10:53:29 PM

Dave Harm · Senior Member

LB, thanks for the link... that site is awesome. The webmaster of it and myself kind of say that we sponsor each other... a lot of good info on that site...

It is kind of interesting that "Bill W. struggled with depression and looked for help outside of the Twelve Steps," was mentioned. Bill had the idea from his own battles with depression, that AA alone would have turned him back to drinking... he needed the spiritual aspect to make it work...

gonee · MIP Old Timer

LB thanks for the link. There is also a wonderful book written about these 2 men. It's called the "Soul of sponsorship."

angelov8 · MIP Old Timer

I have been thinking that it's possible our defects are removed (if we are willing) in Hp's time, not when we want them gone. When I first did the 5th, 6th and 7th step I somewhat hoped for dramatic fireworks and deep revelation and absolute excavation. What I have discovered is that defects are sometimes ingrained behaviors that I have develped over time. It's hard to recognize and understand how they manifest in my behavior and thinking. For example, I used to think that I was depressed because that was how I was born, it was a natural part of my character. I have recently come to view my depressive states as a defect and a behavior I have a choice about. I am being more able to recognize when my thinking is leaning toward this state, and that I can do something about it, it's not just, "how I woke up and I ride it out until it dissappears", which is how I used to live.

Many of my defects I developed as crappy defensive mechanisms that no longer serve me.

I used to take Yoga classes and have seen older,rigid bodies come to move, stand, and sit in different positions totally alien to a lifetime of being in a certain way. They did this through willingness, belief in the possibility of change, and mindfull daily practice.

I now feel that if I apply the same techiniques to my defects while cultivating the spiritual principles of the AA program, little by little and sometimes a lot, my defects are being removed.

My Hp knows when I my application is complete and I'm ready for a new position in life.

Klaatu · Senior Member

Agreed Angelov8. I too wanted to experience the joy of being "defect free" after doing 6 and 7, and imagine my dismay when it didn't happen over night. I've come to realize (and accept) that today I still have some defects that I'm not ready to let go of yet. In fact, if I'm honest I'm guarding them as best I can. I'm human, and still enjoy taking them out and "playing" with them from time to time. This program is about progress, and as long as I keep my forward momentum going, however small the steps may be, I'm doing the right thing for me. I'm grateful that HP lets me know when enough is enough, and that it's time to put them away. Maybe someday I'll be free of them, but until that day (God's timing) I'll not beat myself up for doing what human beings do.

K.....

Jorvick · Veteran Member

Don't know why but somehow I got the impression that steps 6&7 are the biggest steps in the BB (I only attended BB meetings during early recovery).
Maybe because these steps are short in BB I started looking elsewhere for input..... I think I've read most of the approved literature now and well into the Hazelden library - this was in the first couple of months.

Where my head is on this step ...... I tend to incorporate 5 pillars of islam, 12 traditions, 10 commandments, deadly sins, heathen noble virtues into my daily life.... but the overall desire is to drop that down to 12 traditions and NV's.

Always the same on the current step - MAD.. I know I've got a step when it becomes simple... Although I'm quite impressed I've been following muslim guidelines on borrowing - I've not used any credit cards or borrowed money for nearly a year now (similar date to sobriety)