Alcoholics Anonymous
Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Post Info TOPIC: Manipulative behavior is almost always selfish behavior


MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 1008
Date:
Manipulative behavior is almost always selfish behavior
Permalink  
 


Today's thought from Hazelden is:

When am I manipulative?

Without understanding our motives, we can easily lapse into behavior aimed at manipulating others. Sulking is a means of letting others know we are displeased and forcing them to attempt to win our approval. Flattery is a false expression of approval that we don't really feel - giving others good strokes for our own purpose. Withholding deserved praise is a means of putting others down, something we're likely to do because of our jealousy.

Manipulative behavior is almost always selfish behavior. It is usually a false means of trying to get our own way. It is certainly an immature way of dealing with people and situations.

The best way to avoid being manipulative is to be ourselves at all times. We have neither the right nor the responsibility to control or regulate other people. Our best approach, in trying to influence another's actions, is simply to state our own case with sincerity and honesty. Others must be free to act, free to choose, and free to make their own decisions without manipulative interference on our part.

I will be myself at all times today. I will not assume false roles simply for the purpose of bending others to my own will. Manipulative behavior is controlling behavior, which I must avoid.



__________________


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 463
Date:
Permalink  
 

Thank you Larry for this.

I am currently sharing accommodation with someone who is a master of the sulk and the withholding of praise......infact very critical.........

Not saying I am perfect myself but seeing your post helps me see it as ALL to do with control with this person.

God, it's exhausting. Not much longer of it to go now.......blankstare

God grant me the serenity.........

Love
Louisa xx

__________________
Sober today thanks to the Miracle of AA


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 268
Date:
Permalink  
 

It's only for today, Louisa, only for today.

Seriously I hope it gets better (different, over) soon.

rain

__________________


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 463
Date:
Permalink  
 

(((Rainspa))) aww
Thank you for the reminder.......so easy to forget in the midst of it all !
Thank you.
Louisa xx

__________________
Sober today thanks to the Miracle of AA
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.