One of my earliest sponsors counseled me that to reach peace of mind and serenity I would have to break with everything alcohol in my life and focus on the program. That break would include not drinking myself and my alcoholic/addict second wife. My first wife was an addict...my next relationship was alcoholic...my second wife was alcoholic/Addict I married the women I drank with and tried to sponsor their addiction "do it right" was my motto and I (we) lost everything. What I was left with was an ongoing invitation to keep coming back to the rooms of recovery, be patient, open minded, humble (teachable) and practice, practice, practice. I've learned many things and gained a new life. I arrived at learing the difference between loving another and needing another and was able to let go of neediness settling on unconditional love. I would marry again...not needing to or fully intending to yet more confident because we share the 12 step, 12 tradition spiritually based program of recovery and because of that I look back on the 19th of August and realize that tomorrow, and God is willing, my spouse and I will celebrate 16 years of marriage; a period of time that surpasses the total time of both of my prior marriages and also her first marriage.
All of you know how it came to be...you practice the same program and relate that "it works when you work it". All of you share your experiences about useful and positive change telling me what it was like before you did change. Prior to and during this marriage period I have listened and I have practiced and I have chosen to live differently than I was accustomed to when drinking and one day at a time in a most acceptable fashion our marriage has overcome the molehills and outlasted the signs of aging. We are still one day old and grateful beyond imagination.
We will not do cake and have a big get together saving that for the grandsons brithday later on in the night. We will do Mexican!! There will be no Cervesa no worms at the bottle of a toxic chemical...just muchos tacos y zero calorie Pepsi y salsa con queso, frioles, pollo y carne asada...I gotta live one more day just for mexican and I will stay married too.
Wow many congratulations Jerry!!! Super great stuff, and a super great meal to celebrate!! Now I am starving for Mexi-food, at 7am!!! LOL Hope you are having a wonderful time with this.
:o)
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
Hard for me to imagine wanting to be married again, right now, but when I see couples who really enjoy each other's company while being comfortable in their own skin, I remember to "never say never". Enjoy!
Amen! Jerry! A blessing to be able to share you joy,happiness ,pain and life with someone alongside of you.Congrats on 16 years...I know I love my wife more every day ,something I would never have thought possible many years ago..Through the grace of God,our continued diligence to "do the work" miracles continually arrive...Enjoy and savor the day,and thanks for helping keep me sober one more day at a time!!!:)
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
I love Mexican Food.......and Italian Food......forget it----I love all food!! But as long as I work out I can eat as much as I want!! Congratulations Jerry!! Keep the miracle going...enjoy your comida!!
That is beautiful, Jerry & congratulations. It speaks about the potential for relationships in Step 12 of the 12 & 12. Taking part in a double programmed partnership is a wonderful experience for me too. It continuously teaches me how to love & allow myself to be loved in action. Just another of the many joys this way of life brings & I rejoice in your success. Bless you both. You are all so worth it! Love in recovery & fellowship, Danielle x
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!