Cant get your post on separate Wendy? Here-grab my hand--wele give you a boost gal.:)

There yu go!!

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hi there

another one of those days where i can't start a new thread...sigh...so if you don;'t mind i'll add my day here

been doing lots of turning it over the last couple of days...i think back over the last year...where i was..where i am today...i'm a different girl. I was letting some things..ya ok...lets get real here...a relationship... cloud my priorities. I thought if i did what i thought he wanted i'd get what i want. Instead i got what i needed, and today i think...i say..i think...i'm ok with that. My heart hurts but i'll live. I don't have to drink over it. My ego wants me to drink, to take a hiatus from life and my responsibilities, my pain and guilt and shame but my spriit is stronger today, ego ain't gonna win.

Doing lots of meetings..and good meetings, last night was on step 11. God gave me 2 ears and 1 mouth for a reason. Been reading my BB lots. How it works...the more i read the more it sets in. How different stuff jumps off the pages when i need it.   Am i grateful?? you betcha! A year ago i had no home, no job, no self respect, my girls had no faith in me what so ever. I ;ve come a long way, i ain't givin' up. Someone out there will never have the little bit of serenity i've known. They'll never know what it's like to live on the other side of the street. I've known hell and had a little taste of freedom. What is my purpose today? To stay clean and sober, and the rest will follow. If i'm sittin and stewin' in the past or concerned about my future how can i possibly make concious contact with my HP today? How can i hear my HP if i'm not listening? So today i'm practicing stillness and being in the moment. There are some things i've been putting off doing because i'm scared of success, tell an addict to do something and 9 times out of ten we ain't gonna do it. I know what i should do...so today i'm not gonna 'should' on myself.

Ya Phil, life is short...but i have today to make the best of.

Open to trust

“When I grip the wheel too tight, I find I lose control.”

-- Steve Rapson

WE SEEK TO CONTROL OUR LIVES WHEN WE DO NOT TRUST, WHEN WE DO NOT LOVE. Our ego, perceiving itself to be vulnerable and insecure, uses control in an effort to protect itself.

At the root of our need to control, we find FEAR. It may be fear of the unknown. Fear of not coping. Fear of loss. Or possibly even fear of looking stupid. And as our efforts to control other people and events invariably fail, our fear increases.

Trust, on the other hand, is a quality of the soul. While control is a tool of the mind, TRUST AND FAITH ARE ASPECTS OF THE HEART. Trust comes with the deep knowing that we are spiritual beings in physical bodies. When we trust enough in life to give up our need to control, we can relax and open to the flow of energy in our lives. This brings peace of mind.

"The only real security in life lies in relishing life's insecurity."

-- M. Scott Peck

If i stay in the moment, i have nothing to fear.

have a great sober 24 and i'll take one for myself

hugs, Wendy