I have been attending meetings but have not been able to break out of my shell and participate. I have been sober since January 30th and am surprised I have made it this far. I need to find a sponsor and get started on the steps.
Any suggestions would be appreciated.
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And sometimes to help them we have got to help ourselves. - SRV
If there is someone you respect and has some time in being Sober just ask or ask that person to recommend someone. It was hard for me to ask because I am the type who doesn't like asking for help in anything but please ask someone. There may be someone there that is just waiting for you to ask them.
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The smallest of good deeds is greater than the best of intentions.
Anonymous
chair set up greeter coffee clean up chair break down buttcan monitor sweep and mop the floor later on literature person grapevine rep
be of service
get there early and stay late and help
That's the only way I have ever been able to break into a group and be "part of" in some fellowships, some are strong fellowships and will seek out the newcomer and new attendee, make them feel welcome and introduce them around like where I got sober, we surround the newcomer, we mug them and drag them to coffee, poor bastards are mobbed, in some areas, that isn't their strong suit, as was talked about in another thread they get into cliques without realizing cliques kill people in AA, they go to meetings to meet their own selfish needs and get their AA "fix", and say hi to their friends, not realizing the groups primary purpose is to carry the message to the alcoholic that is still suffering
It's on us to break that invisible barrier, and what has ALWAYS done it for me was commitments, people see you showing up at the same meeting week after week and setting up chairs or whatever, they start to talk to you
If they have no commitments available, arrive at the meeting 20 minutes early and station yourself at the front door and say "Hi, welcome to the meeting" to every person that walks by (we give that commitment to newcomers it's called strangely enough, a "greeter" not only will it get you connected but I have heard more then one story of an alcoholic that was at their first meeting that credits the greeter with getting them through the front door
you earned the chair, now claim it
After you get to know some people start shopping for someone who has what you want, who's actions seem to match their shares, and who has worked the steps out of the book with a sponsor who also has worked all 12 steps out of the book
-- Edited by AGO on Tuesday 15th of June 2010 01:36:15 AM
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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
I suggest going to a small meeting, perhaps a women only meeting... I attend a small women only meeting and usually in the beginning they ask if there are any newcomers, if they need a sponsor, and then they ask all the women who are able to sponsor to stand up state their name and length of sobriety.
I'll be you're temporary sponsor till you find one. Are you ready to take some suggestions to improve your program? You might have some reservations in that department, hence the reluctance to move forward and get one.
I'll be you're temporary sponsor till you find one. Are you ready to take some suggestions to improve your program? You might have some reservations in that department, hence the reluctance to move forward and get one.
I accept your offer of being my tempoary sponsor. I am ready to take suggestions on improving my program. I sent you a message with my email.
Thanks,
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And sometimes to help them we have got to help ourselves. - SRV
Much of having a sponsor I have found is about having a person to be accountable to to make the changes that I feel uncomfortable with. For this alcoholic, much of me getting better had to do with walking through fears and situations that I used to get drunk over. Yours may relate to social anxiety. You need to walk through that fear and the steps and various assignments from your sponsor will help you. You may just be a shy and reserved person, but it should not be cripling to you in any way, shape, or form. I wish you a happy journey and try not to beat yourself up in the process of working with your sponsor and changing the things about you that you can change, accepting those you cant, and gaining the wisdom to know the difference.
Mark
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
You might have some reservations in that department, hence the reluctance to move forward and get one. 