I am starting to really see these 12 Steps as "Steps toward Freedom", freedom from much more than just alcohol and drugs. We relieve ourselves from jobs we were trying to do which we just weren't cut out for. We have been trying to make things we did not know how to make, stop things we had no power to stop, start things that weren't ours to start, struggling to meet needs that were usually ALREADY MET ( but we wanted bigger, and better, and right away.....)

"More-Ism". The things I did to get rid of my fears caused me more fear. Everything I did, most of my defects of character, revolved around fear of being alone. I lied to you for your acceptance, so I wouldn't be ALONE. I tried to pump my image up beyond what I really am because I didn't think you would like me, and I did not want to be ALONE. I got involved with you, knowing that you could not fulfill my needs in a relationship, because I feared being ALONE. I ignored or avoided or rejected you, because if I developed intimacy with you, you might abandon me and I would be ALONE. When I said mean things about you, I was trying to fit in with a crowd because I feared being ALONE. When I hated and slandered and threatened you, I did it because you left me ALONE. (and that is your choice as a person.)

Loneliness is something alcoholics know like no other humans. We simply believe that we are perpetually alone, and that we can cure our loneliness by lying, cheating, forcing, denying, exaggerating, expecting...... but we never cure our own loneliness. And we work too hard at it, and to no good end, and sometimes, to the point of extinction.

What if just for today, we stopped exaggerating? What if just for today, we stopped trying to force our will on others? What if just for today, we stopped expecting others to fulfill our needs? What if just for today, we STOPPED, period, and let God take us to better things?