When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help, I want the hand of A.A. always to be there. And for that: I am responsible.
What does that mean to me? What is the hand of AA? Does that mean I am supposed to be the hand of AA? What does that statement mean "I am responsible" anyway, isn't it the groups responsibility? When I see a newcomer walk through the door, with their life in tatters, Do I just tell them "keep coming back?" or "don't drink and go to meetings" and maybe give them my phone number? Do I talk to them after the meeting? Do I have a book in my car, so I can get it to look up the correct questions to ask? Do I even know what page numbers the correct questions are on?
Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime.
Do I know what questions to ask them to fully acquaint them with a good knowledge of their condition? To use Socratic Questioning to either break through their denial and help them find out if they are a heavy drinker, a potential alcoholic, or a real alcoholic? Have I done this with myself? Have I gone through the Doctor's Opinion and More about Alcoholism and turned all of the statements about alcoholics into questions, and asked if they are true for me? Do I know the difference between a real alcoholic and a hard drinker?
Highly competent psychiatrists who have dealt with us have found it sometimes impossible to persuade an alcoholic to discuss his situation without reserve. Strangely enough, wives, parents and intimate friends usually find us even more unapproachable than do the psychiatrist and the doctor.
But the ex-problem drinker who has found this solution, who is properly armed with facts about himself, can generally win the entire confidence of another alcoholic in a few hours.Until such an understanding is reached, little or nothing can be accomplished.
Do I just leave that for "other people" to deal with, in the hopes someone will come along that knows what they are talking about?
Am I willing to stay up all night working with someone who is ready to kill themself? Who doesn't understand why they can't stop drinking? Who doesn't know what is wrong with themselves? Will I answer the phone any time of the day or night?
"Our very lives, as ex-problem drinkers, depend upon our constant thought of others and how we may help meet their needs"
If a newcomer turns out to be a real alcoholic, do I know how to help them? Have I gone through the steps myself so are in a position to take this newcomer through the steps?
The hand of AA doesn't drink, the hand always looking for a handout invariably drinks.
People wonder "How It Works"
We come we come to We come to believe We do the work We clean house We help others
It is a design for living that really works, the people who do that don't drink
-- Edited by AGO on Saturday 15th of May 2010 07:49:55 AM
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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
