I'm shocked and saddened to learn of the alcoholic death of an old friend from the program. Yet, like my father's death many years ago, it's not surprising that a person would die from a fatal disease.
My friend had some years of sobriety. He was a good friend, we did have other activities together besides meetings at one time. But it's a familiar story. Sobriety was good to him. He prospered materially, life was good. Other things took priority over meetings... sports, work, church. Eventually he stopped going to meetings all together. It was some time after that, I heard he was drinking again. And just the other day, I heard he was gone.
The disease knows no bounds. This person had a richer and fuller life than I could ever even imagine. He went places and did things I'll never do. He died with more money than I'll ever see. Yet today, I'm sitting here sober, and his family is arranging his funeral. I lost my friend years ago - this was just the epilogue, and the final answer to the question, if he'd ever come back.
I know very little of the details surrounding his death, only that it was an alcoholic death. The details are unimportant. He died of alcoholism. I'm grateful that I knew him, I'm grateful for his friendship, and I'm grateful to be sober and alive today.
My condolences to you. I have lost many friends to alcoholism over the years. That I believe is why I tend to get fanatical about AA. All we can do is carry the message and then leave it in God's hands.
Larry, --------------------- If they´re ready, you can´t say anything wrong. If they´re not ready, you can´t say anything right.
I'm so sorry to hear that. My condolences. Even if we know it's a strong possibility it's still hard and scary when that happens.
I guess it's like a thunderstorm. As a life-long midwesterner, I've been through hundreds of them. A big, loud, overhead thunderclap is a distinct possibility and I have known that since childhood. But they still make me jump out of my seat when they occur. It's strange. The real sadness didn't set in until I made this post yesterday, although I got the news three days earlier. I didn't have any words to sum it up until then.
Hi there Barisax, thanks so very much for posting this. While I am very sorry for your loss, this story will certainly help me to stick with my program. This re-inforces my belief that I must make *AA* my number 1 priority.
Your post brought me instant gratitude. Your friend and I have very similar stories. I was sober nearly 18 years, stopped going to meetings for a couple of years, then took a drink and stayed out for 2 years. My pride would not let me return as a newcomer, and I lived a miserable life (despite appearing to have all that anyone could wish for) with a belly full of alcohol and a head full of A.A.
For those who may be out there in the midst of relapse after significant sobriety time, please swallow your pride (before it swallows you), and get thee to a meeting. Call an A.A. friend or the A.A. hotline to get someone to walk with you into a meeting. I will not tell you it was easy; it was not easy at all for me. But, I will promise you: if you walk through this, it will get better and better, and easier and easier. Jump back in with both feet: 90 meetings in 90 days, get a sponsor immediately, begin again in the 12 steps with your sponsor immediately. It worked before, and it will still work. Remember, you're head is not your friend, and the disease of alcoholism will
As St. Pete Dean told me when I first posted on this site after a year sober again and when I was struggling with remorse and self-pity, I didn't "lose" the 18 years I was sober; I lived them and they are years that I remain grateful for today. Three years, 8 months since my return, I again have peace and serenity (and a newfound respect for the cunning, baffling and powerful nature of alcoholism) through the 12 Steps of A.A.
