Selfishness, Self centeredness, that we think is the root of our problems
I used to think that selfishness meant greedy, and I didn't relate, I am generous, not greedy, but it turned out that that's not what that meant at all
Among other things, it means "I am not much, but I am all I think about"
THAT is the root of our problem
Alcoholism isn't simply "I drink too much and my drinking is causing me problems" if that was the case all we would have to do is stop drinking for awhile and our problems would go away, like it does for heavy drinkers
Alcoholism is an untenable sobriety followed by untenable drinking, rinse and repeat
Sobriety gets so painful an alcoholic HAS to drink, then once the alcoholic starts drinking (and the whole Universe goes aaaaaah when the alcohol hits our lips) the drinking is so unmanageable and causes so many problems, so much grief and remorse, that the alcoholic eventually has to try and stop drinking again...
which gets so painful......
As is mentioned in another thread, alcohol is only a symptom.......alcohol is actually our medicine, to let us fit into the world around us....
until it stops working.....
That's the confusing thing about alcoholism, newcomers come in and think their drinking is what is wrong with them, but until someone explains the difference between alcoholism and drinking too much they can't figure out why:
A. They either can't stop drinking B. If they are able to stop, their life gets so painful that a return to drinking is inevitable
We are sober every single time we put that FIRST drink to our lips, so it's not drinking that is the root of our problem, or in the morning we would be cured
__________________
Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
When I came to AA and started cleaning house I discovered that the dictionary should have had my picture next to the definition of Selfish. Helping others was a good start for me to start getting out of me. It takes a lot of time and practice to be unselfish but it can be learned and can be habit forming. (A good habit)
Larry, --------------------- Humility does not mean thinking less of yourself than of other people, nor does it mean having a low opinion of your own gifts. It means freedom from thinking about yourself at all. ~William Temple
i totally agree, i never thought i was selfish but sadly i am seeing how i did not care about anyone else while i was drinking. and to look back....what is the point to drink until you blackout or get out of control? its not fun....you put yourself and others in danger and for what? for the just over a week that i have not drank....i feel so much better, and i remember you can still enjoy things while u r sober. i dont want my rock to be alcohol anymore.....i want my love of my life to be my rock....when i am stressed,angry,scared...i want to run to him, not to a stupid bottle. if you are reading this Todd, i love you with all my heart and no matter what you decide i will always have you number 1 in my mind.
