I made that first meeting. It was something. And you all were right, I feel great right now! I was welcomed with open arms and have never felt so loved from people who don't even know me. It was amazing. I got a white chip! And my plan is 90 meetings in 90 days! There are many thru-out the day so that will help a lot! Got a list of women's numbers, but found myself wondering do they really care if I call them at 2am. I think they do. The only condition they have is call BEFORE taking a drink. I was told if you call after a lot of them won't talk to you. I plan to attend the same place and find the "one" I feel comfortable with and who is willing to sponsor me. The one I can tell all the personal stuff to, and call AFTER I have a drink - hopefully I won't but....... because without this person who's willing to listen to all the stories I can't do this......... I'm soooooo thankful for this forum and for all of you....... OH! I tossed the beer!
Old Pro, Congratulations ! Ninety meetings in ninety days will be a great way to start your sobriety. You are so fortunate to be where there are so many meetings.You faced your fear and that is a huge step.
I'm glad you tossed the beer, wise choice. Keep posting here, keep going to meetings. Welcome again to this board.
Congratulations!!!! I'm very proud of you. AA has saved my life, I honestly wouldn't be here without them. One day at a time, it's all we have to concern ourselves with.
Way to go for tossing that beer!!!
For myself...if i think about relapse...taking that first drink...i'm sure it will happen. Instead I picture myself in my minds eye as sober, happy, smiling, loving, laughing and most of all living!!!
I have been sober for a year now, I honestly never thought it was possible. I guess that's why it didn't happen...until I admitted, accepted and surrendered, I almost resolved to stay in the hell I was in. I was beaten up by my boyfriend my last use day...running down the street with no shoes...no shirt..because I slipped out of it to get away from his grip...it was awful!!! Anyways I went to detox and two treatment centres one after the other...a total of 4 1/2 months of treatment...I haven't looked back since!!
I feel my feelings today, I don't have to drown them. I've learned to let go of my anger and most important my fear. I don't live in my past anymore!!!
I have forgiven myself somewhat, its something I work on every day. I've learned to like myself, and love me for who I am. Acceptance is the answer to all my problems!!
I lost contact with my 2 beautiful girls and the rest of my family, I'm getting that back today. My oldest daughter has lived with me since December 5th. We've never been closer. My family is learning to trust me and have some faith in me. But more importantly I have some faith in myself...in my future...but only if I look after today.
Thanks guys! I was up till almost 4am on this site reading everything and when I ran out here I looked for others. I read all the pamphlets they gave me at the meeting and I've decided I'll start a journal. It's amazing how posting things here has helped and I want to keep my own personal journal so when the day comes it's my turn to be speaker I will have it to reflect on!! I related to so many things the speaker said last night, and all these years I thought I was the only stupid drunk in the world!!! It's Independece Day today and I've never felt so FREE in my 39 years of existence........all my friends will be cooking out today and drinking, they expect me there, I'll be at AA. Meetings start soon and they have them all day every couple hours. If I have to I'll start at the top and work my way down........ Happy 4th All..... "op"
Hi Wendy. A whole year - awesome. It's only day 4 for me and I feel "if I can do it, ANYBODY can". Atleast I feel this way today.....as for you running down the street no shoes or shirt, well girl, I been there, done that, got the (torn) t-shirt to prove it - LOL. No more, for either of us, right? Right! Today is another day. Another day I won't drink and I hope you won't either.
"OP", Sounds like a great plan,as many meetings as possible will help you so much. Isn't it funny how we think we are so unique and no one else has ever been where we've been. And then we hear that someone else as walked the same path,what a relief.
Have a great, sober 4th....you are on a new journey.
GammyRose, thanks a million. I am amazed. The funny part is I have known & know so many others with similar stories, but always thought they "handled" it. I was the only one who was the drunk....... you have a great sober 4th yourself.... you are one awesome lady......"op"
It's 10 pm here and I'm finally getting on to read the posts from today...I join everyone else in saying...WHOOO HOOO!!! Committing to 90 in 90 and tossing the beer, getting a phone list, hitting all the meetings today...You are starting on a journey that you can continue on for life. Welcome to the best rest of your life.