Okay - I've noticed that a large percentage of people in recovery have an above-average involvement with their pets. Why? I don't know. I'd like to hear about other alkie's pets & their situations; past or present.
Mw? First off, I'm kind of a dichotamy when it comes to critters. I respect animals and abhor the cruel treatment of them. If I kill a fish to eat it, I say a prayer of thanks first. I don't think anyone who can't stomach the idea of killing an animal themselves, should eat any. Pets are animals, too. A cat is a domesticated killing machine. A dog finds it's own vomit just as tasty as "Gourmet Dog Treats". Hindu's don't eat cattle because they are sacred, so Westerners who condemn the eating of cats & dogs are hypocrites. I also don't anthropomorphize animals and most of the people who die from getting mauled while attempting to "bond" with a bear in state parks are idiots who watch too darned many Disney movies. Screw that; bears will eat you if they are hungrier than they are scared.
That being said, I love Psymon. He's 1/2 Staffordshire & 1/2 Rat Terrier. He's tough, sweet, hyper and faster than the cats - which amuses me no end. First dog I've ever had that's not afraid of getting his nose stung by the cats. When I was drinking I hated all three animals in the house; the dog and the two cats my kids snuck into my life. I just saw them as annoying machines that turn $$ into poop. Now that I avoid frustration and see more good in everything around me, I really love that dog, and I think he knows it, too. I like taking him for hikes (not walks; he's a butt-head on the leash) and he does okay fishing, too. Now that I'm not a curmudgeon about his existence, the kids play with him more and he's closer to them now, too.
The cats? Eh. Furry things that pee on the bathmat and turn $$ into poop. At least now I don't want to kill 'em. To them too must I extend tolerance...just not my pillow.
I have had a big fat Maine Coon kitty named Kidderroo for 9 years. While drinking I would abandon her and my aunt would come over and take care of her for me. When I came back to reality and back home, she would tell me how my kitty was frightened and cried. It jerked my heart into a million pieces. Now, we are pretty great friends. She does her own thing because she is a cat, but she is not nervous anymore.
My DOGGY is my "daughter", as I have no kids. She is a purebred Norwegian Elkhound. She is fluffy and looks like a smaller gray sled dog, but a tightly curled furry tail up over her back. She is a very smart, loving and gentle creature. I got her when I was sober for over a year, and we developed the most incredible bond imaginable.
I went back out 2 years ago (she is 4 now), and was lost in a horrific bondage to drugs and alcohol. I was gone from homefor 2 weeks. When I was basically "rescued" by my husband, he was crying in the car about how Scouty was crying and whimpering at the door, waiting for me. She was up in the windows every time cars would drive by. She would not eat. She was a wreck, I cried while I was getting drunk and high, because I missed her. Then I would drink or do more, trying to forget.But I could not.
When I scraggled home, she was in such shock that it was me. I immediately fell to the floor with her. She made little puppy noises, and her eyes staring at me broke my heart. All she had wanted was me, her mommy. For a few weeks after, when I was in hte living room she would walk toward the kitchen to get some some water or eat, but she would always turn the corner, and then look back at me, to make sure I was still there. She would interrupt her own meal time to keep "checking". When I would leave the house, she would stare at me and look nervous, not knowing if I would come back.
I can NEVER EVER EVER again do something like that to this poor creature. They say this breed is the "dog of the Vikings",and became so close to their masters, they could not handle the death of their master, and the dogs ended up being buried on the burial ships with the master, to be in "Valhalla"(or Heaven) with them forever.
I love my dog somuch. And she is so very into me. Everyting she does revolves around her mom. She is the most precious thing to me. I never knew how much damage I could truly do with my drinking, until I met this precious creature. I could try to explain to my human family, but there was no way I could ever explain it to her. There have been times where i thought of drinking, and I looked at her and for that moment, and SHE kept me sober. Whatever works, right? She is my child.
I know this is long, bu that is how important this beautiful loving do-no-wrong creature is to me.
And now we are going to snuggle on the bed and go to sleep with her curled up into a furry, happy ball next to me.
-- Edited by jonijoni1 on Monday 16th of November 2009 12:43:36 AM
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
I'm a guardian for a Maine Coon cat, a small grey and orange tabby, and a dog. They are animals that just showed up in my life in a HP way. The kitties have been a source of great comfort and companionship. I am endlessly fascinated by the unique ways they are fashioned, especially all that beautiful soft fur. When I was still drinking, the cats slept with me endless nights while I cried and wanted to die. I often thought I could not kill myself as it would be unfair to them. That may be entirely egotistical, but I am grateful that it at least caused me pause. My drinking did not up to then lead me to excessive behavior where I would neglect or abuse them. I managed to keep their care a priority. My drinking was more connected to intense depression and anxiety. I am sure if I continued it could have led to abuse and neglect eventually.
My dog is a tan terrier, the stafforshire or pitbull type. We rescued her from a fellow using who would leave her without care for extended periods of time. He let us take her home, admitting that he could not be responsible for her well-being. She was five months old, and one week later, I got sober. In early sobriety, she saved my ass. When I wanted to let myself down, I wouldn't cause I knew I had to do right by her. We walk everyday. Instead of wallowing in a pity-party, I focused on what I needed to do to be a good trainer and caretaker. She gets me out of my own head. I think humans get so much more than animals get from us. Domestication has brought lots of benifit to humans and lots of horrible suffering to animals. I can hardly watch half the shows on Animal Planet or National Geographic channels, for example. Despite what feels good to us, I think a dog is still a dog first and the same goes for cats and such. I relate to what you said, Aquaman, about the wierdness of humanizing animals. Domestication, is a fact in our current world and I think it valuable to consider how we choose to live with animals. I think animals deserve the utmost in respect as HP's creatures.
I could go on here, it's something that's dear to me, and in sobriety I would love to commit more energy and time to animal welfare and philosophy. I have conflicting thoughts, as I choose not to eat vegetarian. However, these thoughts are not strictly alcohol related, so I'll relate something else that is:
I shared a story on Friday at my meeting about being at a dinner party at my mom's, where alcohol was present. I was fine with it initially. At one point, I was conversing with an intoxicated newlywed celebrating on his honeymoon. I am an avid reader, which I had told him. He asked me to name some favorite reads, being a bookish person himself. I couldn't think of a single one, not any book I've ever read period. I became completely uncomfortable and paranoid. A minute later, I realized my dog was pacing excessively, totally agitated for no apparent reason. She helped me realize I needed to get out of there pronto! and we left quickly, as my sponsor says I always have permission to do. The thing is, I don't always consciously recognize when I'm uncomfortable. Thank god my dog is more connected to primal safety instincts.
This is just one way in which the animals I live with have been an amazing blessing. I hope I can aspire to give back, what they give freely to me. I continued these sorts of thoughts today as I sucked it up and did poo duty in the yard, admists horrible weather. Caring for them, like caring for myself is not something I have to think of as a chore. If I change my attitude, it is ultimately a way of honoring and maintaining connection to my HP.
Long live poo duty, dirty dishes and paying bills! ;0
It took me a few months to really appreciate my cat once again. I love having her and it is at moments when I feel lonely and think I am all alone in my apartment that she comes up to me and reminds me that I'm not.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
We have two cats. My wife's cat "Tigger" is about 15 yo (hard to believe I've had them both that long lol), and my siamese cat "Mojo" is 8.5 yo. Their both indoor/outdoor and extremely low maintainence. I relate to cats and dogs (all animals really) equally as well. Had several dogs when I was younger but I travel so much that it's just impossible to have one, plus they are a lot of work. We can leave our cats home alone for a week with auto feeder and water and they don't skip a beat with their cat door. If you did that with a dog, he'd tear your whole house apart.
When I was drinking I had a parakeet -- that poor bird was a candidate for Al-Anon! I would come home intoxicated and decide it was time to play with her and hold her -- and when sober I would wonder why she was afraid of me. Luckily for both us I got sober and our lives became a whole lot better....
Today I have a Weimaraner and a tabby -- Cilly, is a rescue she was on the destroy list and we brought her home -- she knows she is the apple of our eyes and she gives back SO much more than she gets. She listens to things I may not be ready to divulge to humans- and I can try out a thought or idea with her -- she likes everything! She licks tears, she passes body heat (and bad air) when snuggling on the couch and she makes me laugh.
The unconditional love and forgiveness she shares is just the ticket some of us may need -- we are worthy of the love of an animal and in some ways the caretaking and responsibility of them lead us to know we are capable of bigger (not necessarily better) responsibilities!
-- Edited by kj on Monday 16th of November 2009 10:54:37 AM
-- Edited by kj on Monday 16th of November 2009 10:55:46 AM
I got sober on 18th October 06, a wednesday. on the following saturday, 21st October 06 a little smoke, tan and white cat came to me for adoption. Her previous carer said that it was either the cat or the kid that had to go, so I volunteered to take the cat. She was about 6 years old but not much bigger than an adolescent cat.
She took to me striaght away and spent days and days trying to tempt me with mice, voles, frogs and rats, a couplke of times even squirrels.
there were rough gypsy ponies in the field, she'd stalk them too - I lived on an old farm at the time - we had a good old time, she wasn't too precocious about what she got to eat, so long as I wasn't too stingy with the pizza and the curry.
occaisionally she'd sneak upstairs to sleep under the bed. She spent hours on my desk when I was working.
ironically, she developed terminal liver failure and I had to take her down the vets just before I moved here.
my wife looks after my other cat, a big, black tomcat who rules the neighbourhood. occaisionally I get to call at my wife's house, he still comes a running and nearly knocks me down. he weighs in at around 15 lbs and stands 32" tall on his hind legs. He's around 12 years old and is slowing down, maybe not much longer for him now.
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
Wow - so many cool stories! I never realized how close people can become with their animal comanions until I paid attention to ya'll's (is "ya'll's" so much of a stretch, even for a charming little colloquialism, that it's too far out to be typed as a friggin' word?) feelings from your companions.
Don't get me wrong...I'd still eat a cat if I had to, just not any of YOUR cats.
(is "ya'll's" so much of a stretch, even for a charming little colloquialism, that it's too far out to be typed as a friggin' word?)
Rob
In north or western Pennsylvania it's "You-ins" or "Yuns". In southern PA of north western MD, it's "Yous". As in what are you-ins, yuns, or you's doing tonight?
I just say ..................
-- Edited by StPeteDean on Monday 16th of November 2009 07:44:04 PM
As a kid growing up at home with my parents and siblings we had an irish setter ... ladybird. She was a great dog.
For 11 yrs I had a miniature pincher and his name was 'cash' .He was a great dog . I got sober the last 2 yrs of his life . I swear he knew when I was drinking/drunk . I had to have him put to sleep cuz he was dying of liver failure and that was tuff, very sad. That took place in April of 08'.
I waited and mourned about 2 months. Then decided I needed a new dog. I had wanted a little female, bout 5lbs. didnt really know what breed, but I was gonna buy her a pink diamond studded collar and dress her up in little dog clothes and take her everywhere with me. Well .... it hasnt quite worked out this way as I had planned. I started to search the net , came across a woman who ran a puppy shelter out of her home. She had 'cavajacks'. cross between a cavalier king charles spaniel and jack russel terrier. Cute little things. I picked one up, as she was located not far from me.
I brought him home. There wasnt a female with the colors and or markings that I liked in the litter, so I ended up with 'Charlie'. OH my gosh, he was adorable as a pup. And I crate trained him, potty trained him and all. He is pretty good still today. I got him in July of 08 , and he was like 7 wks old when I got him.
Well, now he is a little monster, lol. He digs holes, he chases the chickens, he swims in the pond and the creek. He chases squirrels and anything else that is similiar. He's a dog !! He's a far cry from the little female I wanted, lol.
But I'll tell ya, he is such a loving little dog. He is smart, he goes to the door and rings the bells I placed there to let me know he has to go out. He travels very well and is really very attached to my husband. And , hubby has this jack russel terrier Booboo. Booboo is uhhhh bi polar. weird little dog. If booboo were a human being he would be incarcerated Im sure .
boo and charlie get along really good. play together ,eat together, etc. they both travel with us and do that well too.
I feel that my dog Charlie has a special place in my heart that no human being can fill.
Someday I hope to be the person my dog really thinks I am
Pets are work .. ya gotta train em'. And far as Im concerned a person doesnt deserve to have a dog if ya arent gonna train em and just let em run wild or chain em up.
It also is very, very expensive to take them to the Vets too. Ouch !
First of all, I love your original post, Aquaman. I agree with you, although I absolutely love animals of all kinds. Yes, I eat meat. Yes, I've killed my own food and I still fish on occasion.
I grew up with dogs and had cats in college. I agree with kj, who said that the attraction is their unconditional love for us and the fact that they give us simple responsibilities that we can enjoy.
My sweetie and I have two cats-- a fluffy orange&white tiger male named T-Bone who acts like a dog, and a beautiful black&white patterned female named Miss Kitty who acts like a cat, but is affectionate at times. They are both very well-behaved and housebroken. Both fixed, by the way, which I strongly endorse. We took them in as wormy, thin, stray kittens and now they are very healthy, happy adults. There's something about saving a creature's life that is fulfilling. We love them like they were our kids.
In my sobriety, I'm also learning a lot from them. Animals live simple lives and it doesn't take much to amuse them. They enjoy the basic comforts: lying in the sun, snuggling, catching mice, playing with random objects, sleeping, getting a treat now and then. I'd do well to un-complicate my life like that.
When I am sick or just feeling blue, they sense it. They intuitively handle the situation by coming to me and simply lying next to me, staying quiet. It's quite comforting.
This is a great subject! Thanks, Aquaman!
PS-- "Y'all" originated in the Deep South, whereas "you'uns" or "yuns" is Applachian. Here in Tennessee you hear the former in Chattanooga and the latter in Knoxville-- a mere 100 miles away. These expressions fill a need. In proper English, the plural of "you" is "you." The other terms eliminate confusion, just like "you guys" or "youse" in other regions.
At the height of my addiction (s) I begged for a puppy. Insane because I had NO IDEA how much work they were. Chili my miniature daschund is now 3. I love him.....he's like a real live cartoon character!
