So sorry if I worried anyone!! Shame on me for leaving that desperately serious post, and then not coming back for a few days!!! All your replies were so wonderful, so caring, speaking the "Language Of The Heart".
Friends, I am ok, still sober. It has just been a really rough few weeks. I am still fighting the depression demon. Got a chance to talk to some friends after my homegroup last night, I divulged to a few that I am on some medication, and one of them said, "who isn't?"
Anyhoo, have been to a couple of meetings, and I did lead on Saturday morning which went pretty well, and a young lady asked for my phone number. Then my sister in sobriety suggested we go to Dr. Bob's House (it has been turned into a museum of sorts, right here in Akron), and I bought a nice leather cover for my Big Book, that holds an AA coin, and has an inscription on the front about Humility, written by Dr. Bob. Then to Aladdin's, my favorite Mediterranean restaurant.
So that day was good, followed by more days of aggravation, stress, exhaustion and hypersomnia.I got little else done except for at work. Good gracious, I still HAVE a job, thank God for that. But felt like "shiite" for the rest of the week.
Day off today, and slept all day, then tonight when I turned all the lights on, I perked up.... could this be a very simple "DUH" moments??? NONE of the lamps in my house take more than a 60 watt bulb.... and it is dark for months in Ohio (started recently), and my lighting SUCKS..... so,,, onward to check online and see where I can get some new lamps, hopefully ones that go up to 100 watts. I should get one for every room. I think it is a good idea, and that my HP planted that one in my head, pretty sure of it.
Thanks again for the support and love. Not out of the woods yet, but I KNOW I can stay sober one day at a time, and that this too shall pass....
Love and hugs and many thanks, Joni
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
Hiya Joni. Just thought I'd pass on something that has been helpful for me: Its harder for depression to hit a running target. In other words, stay active....get to meetings, talk to friends, excersize, eat, go to movies....do anything except lay around obsessing about how yucky it feels. Im pretty sure I deal with SAD every year....last year I was a running target and it didnt seem as bad. ((hugs))
I deal with SAD in the midwest U.S. from now until February by remembering that somehow, someway, the British can handle it year-round!
Joni, Glad to have you back. I take meds, too. No shame in that. Who knw how many innocent people have been spared a "SHUT THE F*** UP!" thanks to modern chemistry.
Anyway, I gotta get ready for work. I bought a new hat and a new John Lennon tie yesterday and I can't wait to put them on. I'm just glad to have you okay.
Yay! Joni is here, she's not queer, and she doesn't drink any beer! Just a little rhyme I made up. Glad you're okay Joni. The running target quote makes sense to me regarding depression...actually I just like to make it a fast walking target cuz "running" can get a little frantic. Love ya,
Mark
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
Joni, Welcome back! I did miss you. Your needed here, wanted here & loved here. Glad to see your doing o.k.
I'm on meds also. No guilt there, just something I need to stay balanced.
I to am greatly effected by the weather/seasons. I live in the Northeast and it's been cold and getting dark early. My enjoyment comes from working outside. Not able to do that as much this time of year.
The good thing is I still have my HP, Meetings, Sponsor, Fellowship and you people to help me through these times. Thanks for being here for me.
Thanks for your comment on my post. Regarding the lamps, they have those low watt bulbs that only use like 13 watts but put out 100. Costco has an 8 pack for like 8 bucks.
Glad you're back, 'bout blummin time too! Grumpy, Hungry, tired, in pain - which will I sort out first? Ah, a nice cup of tea and two rich tea biscuits sound like the British thing to do! ¬:)
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
Hey Joni, glad to hear that you're OK and let me also say that your share means a lot to me. It's good to know that a well loved and respected person on this board with good sobriety fells like I do sometimes and is able to get through it too. So, just to let you know that you with this thread have helped another alkie with sobriety today.
For me the depression and anxiety can sneak up and sucker punch we when I'm least expecting it. Just glad that I've got the Fellowship and you guys now: you know what it feels like when I say that!
aggravation, stress, exhaustion and hypersomnia.I got little else done except for at work. Good gracious, I still HAVE a job, thank God for that. But felt like "shiite" for the rest of the week.
