Im so tired of being alone and Sad, Its so hard not haveing any friends, my feelings sometimes get out of control and Im overly emotional,,, most of the time I just don't know what to do when that happens..
Matisa, I know that you know by now we are all going to keep encouraging you to go to AA, why? Because we know that it will help you.
I was a loner, liked to isolate, felt more comfortable not reaching out. But, that is not what God wanted in my life, He wants me to reach out, to help others and to allow them to help me.To become a living, breathing,sharing,hugging,sober, happy,caring whole human being. I have learned that in two places, AA,Alanon fellowship and my church family, which I have had several different church families, God doesn't expect me to stay in one place, He wants me to move, to grow, to live life on lifes terms.
I'm glad you can vent here. I read a few of your posts from when I was gone, it is taking me forever to get caught up. Matisa, sometimes God uses people with skin on to help us see what He has for us in this world, please don't overlook what God might have for you.And yes, you help me , I remember what it was like to feel the way you do.
Everything is ok. It took me a long time to acknowledge that feelings are not concrete facts. I argued this idea for such a long time, because feeling bad, sad and mad was about all I knew how to feel, so I just moved through them...round and round.
I'm not sure when it started making sense...but I do remember it began with the 'feeling' jealousy. I remember a mate of mine saying, you're not angry you are jealous and when I admitted he was probably right, he said that jealousy is just a thought...
I thought about this for a long while...it was hard to move past what I was feeling, but the moment I accepted that jealousy was a thought...a thought that made me feel really crappy...I started to understand that feelings really aren't facts. We can change the feelings pretty quickly once we name them (like you have) and decide we no longer want to feel that way.
Once we know what we are feeling, we can change things. One of the problems with labels...is that sometimes people think they provide the answer, and that's all there is to it. Labels are descriptions. They describe something at one moment in time. Our world and our lives are changeable and flexible. None of us fit neatly into a box, but sometimes we let folks put us in them. Sometimes we even put ourselves in them.
By the time you get this message, you will have experienced lots of other feelings besides lonliness and sadness - and it might seem easier to just acknowledge the ones that seem more familiar, but I gaurantee you are so much more than your sadness and your alone times. You are beautiful and special, and kind and considerate, and so much more than you can even imagine right now. You have a friend here, who is looking forward to getting to know you. I am looking forward to hearing about your world and what makes you smile.
I will bung a few posts up the top and I think you might be surprised by how much we all have in common. All the best,
Hi There. Yupper Matisa. The girls have said it. The more meetings I go to the better I feel, and the more new freinds one meets.
Sitting -doing nothing, but not drinking- is something like sitting in the middle of a highway trying to get to a destination, and not stepping on the gas pedal to start moving towards where I wanna go.:)
To feel better we hafta be willing to do certain things--and then it takes action.
New freinds arent going to knock on your door, unless you go out onto the highway, and flag down a few.:)
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Easy Does it..Keep It Simple..Let Go and Let God..
Thanks all ! Yes, I plan on going to A meeting. Nic, I can relate to what you said, Lables are just that lables, I have been labled so much as in my life, with Disabilities, of all kinds To me they are just lables, and it is very unfair to ever be labled, I belive All lables should be done away with. Like I have said before why do we have to say, This child is LD, or this child is MR, why can't we just accept people especially children as they are? Did GOD ever mean for us to treat our kids this way??? I highly dought it ! I think the whole edu. system needs an overhaul perhaps one day I will do just that.
