It isnt fun to watch wagon, when others in our lives have been taken to an early end because of alcohol.
All I can add is "But For The Grace Of God, There go I"
Even in the Program of Alcoholics Anonymous, I see freinds that have quit doin the "DO" things after 15, 20, or 25 years--have quit going to meetings-and either things get too good for them, where they started saying "Maybe I can control it this time" or they hit one of lifes situations, where its just easier to pick up a drink. If I dont stick close to this program and attend meetings on a regular basis, I will go backwards. My thinking will change. Thats just how cunning, baffling and powerful this disease is. We arrest it on a daily basis. We are never cured. And a lot of that is based on the first 3 steps, each and every day--working the rest of the steps as best we can--leading to steps 10, 11, and 12.
Ive been around for a long time, and it just reafirms that I am one drink away from a slow death. It isnt the quantity of sober days--its the quality.
I just hafta keep saying to myself each morning "Nomatter what happens in my life today, I will not pick up a drink" "It would be nothing more than Suicide."
Keep on trucking my freind--just for today.
__________________
Easy Does it..Keep It Simple..Let Go and Let God..
Wagon, I know how you feel and it's good that you can share those feelings. Our AA group has buried 2 people in the last few months, but they died sober, one was in his 50's , had been sober 2 years and one was in her 80's , she'd been sober 30+ years.We mourned their deaths but we also celebrated there sobriety and what they had given us in that.
It's only natural to grieve and to be sad.Thinking of you today .
