Dear All, Had a fab meeting with my supervisor, he has appeared in the form of hp to some extent, excellent outcomes, found a new meeting at the city because I can't afford to miss any. Job situation is that hr wanted a meeting with me tomorrow, I had to push for this meeting in the first place they just wanted to oust me without any correct formalities, have scheduled to meet them of tuesday as my mind is racing all over the place about it and I want to think about the questions I have for them and produce all my evidence of having worked for so long there, though its there job they supposedly don't have evidence of this though I got a payslip each month. I need to practice step 3 and let my hp handle this, I keep grabbing it back all the time, my stress is a direct result of my alcoholic mindset which I've got to work on.
Newcomer, When my mind is where yours is, I increase my involvement in the program, ask for help and let god deal with the outcomes. The final outcome is out of your hands. God has a plan. Let him/her do their handy work. You work on you. Work on your spiritual condition. Worry is caused by excessive self-will and we haven't full surrendered to our HP, just like you stated. When we worry we obsess over everything and try to sort out all the details in our own head. Not a good place to be. It's like a bad neighborhood, never go there alone. Please continue to post through this.
The posibility of losing a job or having to find a new one is a legit stressor as I think you know. The tendency for me in early (earlier) sobriety was to not even see legitimate stressors and to create stress out of situations where there didn't need to be any (I still do this of course, but less and less). You can only do so much planning Lorna. There is some AA saying about "making plans" which is along the lines of "When we make plans, God Laughs." I used to think that planning and preparing for the worst was a good coping skill, but it actually just kept me depressed and anxious because of my constant pessimistic attitude. So for today, remember...it's just work and (though it is a crap economy) everything will work out for you without you having to think ahead too much. I especially know this in your case because you are clearly taking your program seriously and you have already moved in a strong direction of change...A few months ago you were too fearful to even face these situations. Now you are just fearful of the outcomes... It's still great progress. Keep up the good work!
Mark
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