Congrats, Shaun.

I'll tell you about my first A.A. Meeting.  I was required to attend by the treatment center, (and required to be in treatment because of a DUI), so that helped propel my feet in through the doorway.  Otherwise I might not have gone.  Fear of the unknown is a very real thing, so the more you know in advance the better.

Of course, there are differences in meetings - from region to region, and within the same area.  Every meeting is different, even if it's the same group meeting - for example, my home group gets different people every time, and sometimes has a lot of people, sometimes only a few.

But back to my first meeting.  Turned out it was a "speaker's meeting".  This was actually a good thing for me, because a "speaker's meeting" involves just one person standing up front telling their story.  After that, either the meeting ends or another speaker talks, or some people who know the speaker talk.  So there's not much chance that you'll be called on.

However, they did ask if there was anyone new to A.A. or in their first 30 days of sobriety, and asked them to introduce themselves by first name "so that we can welcome you".   I now know that if I had wanted to, I could have just remained silent - but I raised my hand and introduced myself.  I just said my first name and "this is my first meeting".  It is not required to introduce yourself as an alcoholic - many who are just starting out have not yet made that self-assessment. 

They said "welcome", everyone clapped, and they asked if I needed a schedule of A.A. meetings.  I said sure, they passed around the schedule to have people put their phone numbers on the back, and that was pretty much it - the meeting was very large and like I said it was a speaker's meeting so I was able to pretty much just sit back and take it all in.

Your first meeting could be different, but some things should be the same.  They will probably ask if there's anyone new to A.A. - you can raise your hand and introduce yourself, but it's not required. If you do, they'll probably ask if you'd like a schedule and pass it around for you.  They might call on you to share during the meeting - if they do, and you aren't comfortable sharing, just say you'd rather just listen.  They will probably just say "glad you're here" or something like that, and move on to the next person.  After all, we've all been there - in fact it is extremely common for new people to just "pass".  Nobody should pressure you in any way to do anything you are not ready to do.

At some point during the meeting they'll pass around a collection basket because A.A. is self-supporting through voluntary contributions.  If you do not wish to donate, that is 100% fine.  Nobody will give you an evil eye or anything.  If you're court-ordered to be there, you can put your court slip in the basket to be signed.

By the way, it's good to show up a bit early for your first meeting (maybe 15 mins or so) because that way you can find a seat before the place fills up (if it's a big meeting) and not feel like all eyes are on you as you walk in.

At the end of the meeting they'll often hold hands and say a prayer, like the Serenity Prayer or the "Lord's Prayer".  A.A. is not allied with any particular religion and you are not required to participate in this (or any other activity).  If it makes you feel uncomfortable, you can just leave before they say it (they often hold hands in a circle when doing so).  Or you can take part in the circle, but remain silent during the prayer. 

The only requirement for being an A.A. member is the desire to stop drinking, and even that cannot really be enforced.  It talks about "God" in the steps, but that is followed by "As we understand Him".  In reality though, all that is necessary is to accept that you are not the highest power in the universe.  You can consider the A.A. group to be the "power greater than yourself", or choose anything else that works for you.

Well, I may have gone a bit too in-depth but like I said, the more you know, the lower your fear will hopefully be because there will be fewer unknowns.  Good luck!

Glenn

Shaun, Welcome to MIP! Coming here is a good thing to do in addition to going to meetings. It is great that you have made this plan. It is a scary leap to start going to meetings, but like the rest of us, you kind of know when you need it (and sometimes it gets slammed in our face that we need it). I tend to be anxious as well and had actually turned shy from years of drinking when shyness was not part of my demeanor before. When you actually go, I think you will feel relieved. Meetings were actually the first place I started to feel "not anxious" in sobriety. I would find myself closing my eyes, rolling my neck, and listening to How it Works wile preparing to hear some good stuff. I would like to speak for all meetings and say they are a safe and loving place. I think that is almost universally true. I hope you find that the case. Hope to hear how it went. Congrats on 15 days sober!!! Stay strong. Asking for and receiving help is a courageous thing.

Shaun, you're in the right place, bro. Share your fears and triumphs ... we're all here to help you and let you help us!

hi Shaun!! I am looking forward to hearing out it went!! Things are far scarier to us beforehand, than they actually turn out to be, as I hope you are seeing now.

I LOVE your screen name!!! LOL

Welcome to the MIP family!!!

Joni