Too many meetings?

FlyingSquirrel · Senior Member

Too many meetings?

toni baloney · Senior Member

Hi Glenn,

First let me say that I NEVER look inside someone else's car. But that is just me.
is this device really large, and attracts attention???

As for the meetings, 3 a day would take up my entire day, have you thought about setting up some time management for yourself, like as an example, go early in the morning, and then the latest one of the day, this way you would have the daytime to get on with you stuff like looking for a Job, cleaning your house, too bad you probably cannot afford it, but a Housekeeping service, works at times when we get overwhelmed with housework, I have done it, and it is pricey, however, the peace of mind of saying I need help, and getting it, like a new starting point to my house.
A completely cleaned up house sets off a new mindset, it does for me, like the feeling of organization.

It is very hard in early recovery to get all this done. remember that well.

Once a therapist told me, after I had said to her, I am a creative person, dont like housework, (well who does??) her response stuck like glue. she said, even if you go and fluff a pillow or some simple thing toward cleaning, IT IS the Most Nurturing thing you can do for YOU. never forgot that, and it changed my thinking of it as a chore, changed my mind and saw it as just taking care of me. Big difference all in one swoop.

So let us know how this is going ok,

Just one little step at a time, ok.

Hugs, Toni

-- Edited by toni baloney on Thursday 2nd of July 2009 07:35:33 PM

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

Hey Glenn,

If you think that you're hiding out in meetings instead of taking care of business, then you probably are.
"Are primary purpose is to stay sober..." but it's not our only purpose. Just start making daily "to do" lists and get that stuff done. You'll feel better once you get going on those things. When you feel badly about your car ect... turn it into gratitude that you have a license, car, and money for gas. You could be walking or taking the bus.

turninggrey · MIP Old Timer

Hey Glenn,
It is great that you are asking that question because it builds inertia inside your skull to act. I loved Toni's answer. Fluff a pillow. It is an action that will make other actions follow. Don't worry about the car device. Follow the rules. Time will pass. Its gonna be alright.

Jerry F · MIP Old Timer

Aloha Glenn...I remember the 2 and 3 aday early recovery. Yes I put aside all
"the other" stuff and just hung out. It was the best I could do at that point.
Not the better just the best. In a way I was switching addictions as I learned
until I could do it no longer and got responsible with a plan and that included
a sponsor. It works if you work it. ((((hugs)))) smile

pinkchip · MIP Old Timer

I did 2 or 3 meetings a day for the first few months...added up to like 130 in 90 or something. It was all I could do because I was that depressed. So...I can identify. I did have a full time job still though and never took a day off, even when detoxing. But...everything else was on hold and I still don't handle all my responsibilities to the best as far as cleaning and self-care goes. Just do your best and strive for balance. If it's anything like what I think I went through and am going through...I believe you are changing so much and so fast it's scary and depressing at times. You are also dealing with the immediate wreckage of your past from drinking and that is a real hard thing to go through. Character defects hit me hard when I put the bottle down and I sank into deep self-loathing. Keep the positive messages flowing to yourself...If I would have done that, it would have saved me some serious pain.

cajunhorn · Member

Meetings do not keep me sober, God keeps me sober. I should be reminded of that in the meetings I go to. Quite a paradox, eh? The BB says, "We are in the world to play the role God assigns". Do you think that your role is to be sitting in meetings? A meeting is like a huddle in football. At some point we need to break from the huddle and run the freakin play. Early on, when you need the tools and have very little power, then maybe a bunch of meetings are necessary. But if, at some point, you are not picking up those tools to take out into the world, you're missing out on the majesty of the program. Hanging out in meetings is working one part of a three part solution expecting the results of the other two. I know LOTS of people who have eaten bullets white-knuckling it through LOTS of meetings. You can go into a gym and sit around talking about and studying the weights and various machines. You can KNOW them inside and out, even better than the people who manufactured them. Will that make you stronger? Nope. You've GOT TO TAKE ACTION and you can't do that just staying sober on "fear and fellowship". Get a sponsor if you don't have one who gets you into the work rapidly. Get your inventory done and go do a 5th Step. Take that stuff to God and ask him to remove your character defects that stand in the way of your usefulness to others. Make a list of those you have harmed and go clean that garbage up! Somewhere in those Amends you'll be amazed at the sensation of walking in "clean air". Then work 10, 11, and 12 to keep what you've got and help the next little busted up drunk. Like NIKE says, JUST DO IT!! You'll be blown out of the water, guaranteed. Go get 'em!

-- Edited by cajunhorn on Wednesday 15th of July 2009 11:25:35 AM

-- Edited by cajunhorn on Wednesday 15th of July 2009 11:31:13 AM

Sobrietyspell · MIP Old Timer

Thank you, Glenn & thank you all for these wonderful replies. I was worried early doors at how much of an overhaul to me the A.A. way was in my life. Intensive treatment to begin as far as learning these new tools & the new ways of thinking were concerned. I was worried I'd never get off first base & that I'd be stuck on each Step as it came. This wasn't the case. Yes, it took a lot of reading, a lot of meetings, a lot of talking with my sponsor & much homework but in time the rewards came & stayed. It wasn't an overnight job for me but nearly 3yrs on I have a program in my life & I'm able to get on with the business of living too.

Concentrating on recovery as much as I could despite bouts of procrastination was well worth it. I have a working practice of emotional stability today & still more hope & scope for improvement & progress. I was told it would take about 2yrs so not to make any major decisions or enter into any relationships for at least the first year. This turned out to be sound advice for me & now I know the only thing holding me back now is me. Two years sounds like a long time but it's done pretty fast & once done. I don't have to go back. I found it all a good investment for me for my longterm sobriety 1Day@aTime.

I'd say spare no expense of time when it comes to this crucial early phase but also it is important to rebuild in your manageability so the right balance of course is important. Keep up your commitment, Glenn & don't be afraid of what else needs to be done too. Ticking off To-Do lists feels amazing, especially for me :) Share with us how you're getting on, Glenn. I love rooting for you & I love your appetite & desire for your Sobriety. It's so worth it. Keep up all your good work! Danielle x