Hi , if i didnt know that my best thinking got me into the rooms of AA here is my confirmation,
i aplied to university to start a course in october in addiction counselling , and i went for my interview process friday and saturday just gone , and i will find out by this friday if i got in.
So i have been having thoughts , maybe if i just take a drink i will f### up my chances of getting in myself , so i dont have to face them telling me that i havent got in.
i know its crazy thinking but thats why im here , to let it out and see it written ,
aahhhhhh my alcoholic mind
i read other people posts yesterday and it reminded me that i have stinking thinking !
thanks guys you all help so much to right size me !!!!
Yeah...I can identify with that one. My lineage of alcoholism was one of become therapist first, then try every drug and alcohol so I could be in a better position to tell others how to manage their drinking and drug use. Pretty asinine and self-sabotaging. My uncle was also an addict/alcoholic with 3 divorces BEFORE going into AA. My apple evidently fell right from that tree.
Oh yeah...I forgot to state the irony which is sort of implied...my uncle was also a substance abuse and marital counselor prior to AA. So yeah...the apple thing...
-- Edited by pinkchip on Wednesday 17th of June 2009 08:47:44 PM
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Oh my YES!! Self-sabotage!! Boy, did I ever waste a lot of time and money in the past on college, only to start being successful at it, and then to get hammered. And blow it all. You are doing a great thing, seeing that crappy thinking right in front of you, and calling it for what it is. Shedding some light on the disease. Send it back into hiding, because you are better than that! You can and will achieve what you want and need to!! Thanks for sharing. Joni
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
I haven't even wanted to calculate the amount of money I spent on alchohol. It makes me sad to think about how much money I could have saved right now if I hadn't drank so much.
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