Well, My Sunday wasn't great. Weather sucked. Plans got changed due to the weather. This is big for me. Ripples on my pond are not good. I'm more at ease when things go as planned.... alcoholic.. yes I am. Took a nap and woke up with a headache. Poor me. Went grocery shopping and paid for the food to stock my refrigerator in my own house. Getting the picture... cadillac problems... yes but letting go and turning it over not so easy. Sat in my sh*t all day.
Woke up to another gray day and obsessed over my son's All Star tournament. Asking myself why is it we obsess over things? Self will run riot... Like I can change anything regarding him and his tournament even if I think about it all day.
At lunch had the will to return a phone call from a friend in AA. Let him know what's going on with me. He in turn provides me with an update on two AA friends we both know and hang out with. First one is under a lot of stress due to fear over (projecting) his future after having a brain aneuyism 3 weeks ago. Real fear and real problems, you betcha... Got an update on my other friend who went to court and was sentence 1-3 to the State Pen.
I got off the phone realizing my problems are not that big. Could I have figured this out on my own? No, but with the help of the fellowship, I'm able to now see and hear it. God works through people and today I believe he worked through my friend. Alone I can't do it, but together I can. I guess that's why they call this a WE program.
Grateful to be in AA and feeling like things are pretty good at the moment.
Your Post made me recall one of my favorite people in Marin County, he would say in every meeting I saw it at, "My Problems are ALL Gold Plated"
You made me laugh, well sort of, I can do the same thing, I live in California on the Coast, and have had weeks of grey days. I catch myself, with it is only weather, and yesterday they were talking on the News about an upcoming Heat Wave, suddenly the grey days looked mighty pretty!, hahahaha!
I have to remember to ask God to help me turn off that loud thing in my head that is called thinking. Not turn the volumn down, Please help me turn the darn thing off!!!!
Glad you felt a good turn a round for yourself. Sometimes I sort of grumble about how everything is going up in price, like FOOD, then all I have to do is think about the children in other countries that do not get any or very little, that shuts my thinker up, and fast.
Sometimes it helps me to concentrate on only my breathing, slow deep breaths, and I find that it really really helps to change how I am doing, I am doing ok, everything is ok.
So hope you have a better Monday, grey or green or blue.
Aloha Mike B...You are soooo blessed. How many out there can know where the door out is like a recovering AA. I read your post and remember the program teaching me that "Likeing it is optional. Drinking is not." Yowzers...very helpful post. "I am powerless over__________ (fill in the blank with anything)" and you got that down strong; what a blessing and a higher education your program has been. Reach out and touch someone with it.
Wife and I decided to walk after dinner last evening. Town was very very quiet so it was fun. We could loosen the restraints and have fun while we walked. The sky...very dark gray and it started to drizzle. It was soooo light a drizzle and with the breeze blowing off of the bay it was soooo cooling no sweat! There was nothing around us that was out of order...nothing. Not even the car that was following behind us as we walked on the road next to the canoe huts disturbed our walk with his horn. When we were warned that there was a car behind us and got out of the way even the smiles were in order.
I'm reminded of several literature readings that I have found true. Dr. Paul on page 449 of the 3rd edition of the big book; "And I have found that acceptance is the solution to all of my problems." He mentioned before he died that he had no idea that would affect so many lives addicted to alcohol. He didn't...HP did. "Nothing ever happens by accident in God's world." It's all blessings and we can see them. And then there is the Desirata. If you have never read that Google it and when you get it press print.
I found your post uplifting. Thanks (((((hugs)))))
-- Edited by Jerry F on Monday 15th of June 2009 04:10:54 PM
-- Edited by Jerry F on Monday 15th of June 2009 04:11:55 PM
