To all those that responded for my cry for help I thank you. Things are better today and I do not crave to drink the person that I was speaking of in my previous post has come back into my life and she says that she loves me and wants me to get better. She says that she is going to be here for better or for worse and that is all I need. I told her that I am still not going to drink even thogh she does not feel that is my problem. I just wanted to say thank you for all the support and I will be looking forward to your responses. I will try to log on daily for those of you that requested it while I am going through these toughest times but I feel so strong and that nothing can stop me now that the love of my life is back in my life. Once again thank you all so very much. Keep in touch I will and I hopeyou do too.
It's great that someone else is there to make you feel good.I have to ask,though, what will you do if they aren't there? What do we use to replace that feeling of love? What about your relationship with yourself?Sometimes we need to be the love of our own lives, you know?I'm happy that you are reconciled, but don't forget to look inside yourself when times get tough...other people can't fix stuff for us,only we can do the work on ourselves.Good luck,and hope you have a great week!
Hi there Nolongerblind, and welcome to recovery!!!
I have to agree with Crambo, you must learn to love yourself, support and love along the way is absolutely wonderful believe me, i spent the last 4 years alone, with myself, in active addiction, trying desparately to escape myself!!!
But, everywhere i went, there i was!!!
When i finally got sick and tired of being sick and tired, then i accepted, i surrendered and that was the beginning of recovery as i know it.
Anything i put before recovery i will lose!!
Slowly i am learning to forgive and learn to love me, that frees me to accept and love others.
This is a journey not a destination.
So glad you are smiling today, keep coming back!!!
If you are alcoholic (only you can decide that), you're loved one cannot keep you sober. Neither can your strength. It's pretty easy to stay sober when your ass is on fire. We've all done it. But alcohol is cunning, baffling, and powerful. And patient as hell. It will wait and wait, until your ass isn't on fire and you can barely remember it ever BEING on fire or what the yelling was all about. Then will come some excuse for taking that first drink. It might be a trivial reason, or, as in my case, it might be something that scares the hell out of you and you don't know how else to deal with the fear. Whatever. It'll come. I've learned this through 20 years of painful experience. I AM POWERLESS OVER ALCOHOL AND MY LIFE IS UNMANAGEABLE. The only thing that has ever helped me is working the program of AA. For me that means frequent meetings, a network of AA friends, a sponsor, working the steps. Even all those thing never made a permanent change in me. As soon as I stopped going to meetings, lost contact with my network of AA's, etc. the clock started ticking and it was just a matter of time until I drank. Obviously I cannot speak for anyone but me. That's the kind of alcoholic I am. I just cannot stay sober any other way.
Maybe none of this applies to you. Let's hope so. But if you find yourself back in the same situation, or a similar one, again, call information and ask for the AA Central Office. Then call that number and ask the person who picks up the phone to please help you find a meeting.
