He wont stop drinking & she wont let him go

had_enough · Newbie

He wont stop drinking & she wont let him go

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

Had Enough, welcome to the board. Your bold red type was hurting my eyes so I changed it. Well you are in a dysfunctional alcoholic household for sure. Sounds like the home I grew up in except both of my parents were drunks until Dad left. You have about as much control over that situation as you do steering the international space station. The only solution is to find another place to live, although I understand that's not possible at this time. Most likely Mum had an alcoholic for a father and that's what she's comfortable with, and what she associates with love.

you'll find more help at the Alanon family board next door
http://www.activeboard.com/forum.spark?forumID=42727

-- Edited by StPeteDean on Saturday 23rd of May 2009 05:25:26 AM

Doll · MIP Old Timer

Dean said it - you have no control over them.

The only thing you have control over is you. Therefore MOVE OUT!

Best of luck.

Jen

Tina · Senior Member

Morning

I have agree with doll and Dean, there's not point in you adding any more problems to the situation. Or you might want to ask a family member to help out until you find a place of ur own

had_enough · Newbie

My mum had good upbringing her parents were lovely people her father kindest man.

I dont have many people I can stay at their house. Everytime I mention moving she tries black mailing me as she doesnt want to be entirely on her own with him if rest of us wasnt living here god knows what would happen to her. As she`s my mum I want to help but she wont listen to any of us & get rid of him. He wont go to any local AA meetings & worse is he was made redudant from his works so his hanging around the house all the time. He can get through whole bottle of wine and vodka with redball every day.

My own relationship is suffering because of her husband. All this gun crime & stabbing and they dont do it to some1 like him that makes peoples lifes misery.

I am not making any threats just saying sometimes I wish he were dead

-- Edited by had_enough on Saturday 23rd of May 2009 10:53:51 AM

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

be careful what you wish for.

jonijoni1 · MIP Old Timer

had enough, alcoholics make people in their lives just as sick as themselves, if not MORE. There is a saying, "Who is sicker, the person who comes home puking every night, or the one who cleans up the puke EVERY NIGHT?" I could not tell from your initial post here, do you have a child? If so, I would say, live on the streets before subjecting a child to danger like that. Just my take. Keep in mind too, that the courts may be able to throw him out, if he is a menace to a child's upbringing. Dunno about your laws there though.

Get out get out get out. Your mom is a grown woman, and nothing you can do to protect her, if she will not protect herself. It sounds like you are one of the things he uses as an excuse to act out over as well.

No one can make you get out of that situation, but I sure wish I could! You will have to put up with whatever happens I suppose, until you are ready to do something different, and not until. Nothing changes for you, if nothing changes. And all you can change in this situation, is your address.

Joni