IF I'M NOT THE PROBLEM, THEN THERE IS NO SOLUTION"
When I came into the program, I had a lot of problems and most of them were your fault. My girlfriend didn't understand me; my boss didn't appreciate me; the police didn't like it when I drove after just a few drinks (I was fine!), and on and on. If everyone would just get off my back, then Id be fine I thought.
When I began working my program, I was introduced to the 4th Step - made a searching and fearless moral inventory - and my sponsor showed me how to make a list of all the persons and institutions I resented. Finally I could put down on paper and document how I had been wronged. Perfect! I thought. But then he slipped in a fourth column called, "My Part", and told me to document my role in all my resentments and interactions.
Now that was a tough pill to swallow. With his help though, and a willingness to be fearless and thorough, I was able to see that I did have a part in them all. And what a gift that turned out to be! I discovered that if it was all your fault - and I certainly couldn't control or change you - then I would forever be a victim and nothing would change. But if I took responsibility for my part - which was something I could control and change - then I was released from the bondage of resentment and was finally free to live a new and better life. Thank God!
"...document my role in all my resentments and interactions"
A very good journaling activity!
This one could be tricky, as we can usually see everything else about anyone else but not on the "self". Why is this so?
We are born egocentric, but in healthful development we can grow far beyond. Being hooked on any kind of addiction is going to ascertain that we don't get far beyond the youthful egocentrism.
