I went to my first meeting tonight in 5 years. Funny how I forgot how stimulating they are. Also all the stuff I forgot about meetings, sponsers, home groups, etc. Also forgot about the people. I guess I expected the people to look how I felt while I was using. I found myself looking around the room and at peoples faces and thinking that they looked like everyday normal people and it was hard to believe they ever had a drinking problem. It's funny how that when I was out using and thinking about A.A. and the people there I pictured sad looking broken down depressed faces and sorryful stories. But while there tonight I realized that really that was the faces of the people I was partying with at the bars! At the bars it was always people borrowing money and running tabs to drink with, gambling on silly things and losing only to make it a topic of conversation on why the team lost for the next 2 hours, complaints about bills not paid, slurring and cussing, not to mention the fights.
At the meeting, while there may have been a sad story told in which almost everyone I could relate to, all had a happy and inspirational ending with what sobriety had done for them. Amazing!
Not to mention I recieved my 24 hour coin too! Forgot about them also!
We sure are quick forgetters, eh?? I know what you mean about thinking certain things in regard to people in AA. I think our minds tell us lies about AA while we are out drinking to keep us away, and feeling high and mighty.
I am so glad you got back, welcome home. :o)
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
I'm so glad that you made it back to a meeting! That's great news. For this alcoholic, I couldn't maintain my sobriety without regular meetings and the help of everyone in the rooms.
Please keep posting and letting us know how things are going for you, won't you?
Take care,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
I will. Matter of fact i just returned from anothet f2f meeting. This one only had about 12 people and was very intimate unlike some of the larger meetings. I even raised my hand for comments and read from the Big Book. It was a little intimidating with such few people but I knew I had to do it. I really need to work my meetings.
