Nothing in particular. Physical pain has been better. Feel pretty much OK. But haven't been to work the last 2 days (thank God for sick time). Just got the 'don't wanna be there' funk! I have isolated since Saturday. Haven't talked to anyone, not even my sponsor, haven't been to a meeting since last week. Not thinking of drinking, just want to be left alone! God! This needs to pass. I'll end up using all my sick days in January!!! eeek.......Any suggestions (I know I need to get to a meeting & call my sponsor) or thoughts........
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
Sorry you are feeling this way, I can really relate I went through some of this over the holidays, good that you are reaching out. Reaching out helped me. Here's todays reading sounds like a good one for you today, hope it passes soon, we do know it will pass, hugs, Deb January 13, 2009
Isolation
Isolation is bad for new people, old people, and in-between people
if they are alcoholic people. Isolation sneaks up on us.
We can mask it with familiar props that are not in themselves bad.
We can isolate ourselves in an attempt to clean up our apartments
(and then not do the cleaning);
we can isolate ourselves in churches or in sleep; we can use family,
sweethearts, compulsive working, television. The list is long.
The nicest way to end it is the way you and I do: together.
First off, I want to say I don't know all the answers...I am a newcomer and feel awkward giving any suggestion to an oldtimer. What I am not a newcomer at is dealing with depression. I have had that for 11 years and it is a related and separate problem from my alcoholism. Getting sober has tripped off a full on depressive episode for me and combining what I am learning in meetings with what I already know, I realize I have to go to any lengths to get better. So for me, that meant seeking therapy and a change in meds. Deep down, even though it feels like my soul is telling me to lay in bed, talk to no one, and cry all day, I know if I do nothing, nothing will change.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
Pinkchip, although I am a newbie, what you just said is very important. Just cause your "new" doesn't mean that your experience is less valuable. What you just said is very valuable!
Hey Doll--Been there, done that and I'm very grateful I've been able to get through these times without drinking. Some say that if they can get through a day without a drink that thats the best they can do. But, for me, there came a time where that wasn't good enough and it was getting too dangerous to isolate this way. I may not have taken a drink, but some may have wanted me to.
If I can't or don't want to call my sponsor, I call this program friend of mine who will let me whine a while and then with her ES&H tells me some of the possiblities I could be looking at. One of her favorite suggestions is to call someone new or struggling in the program. I'm always amazed at how I feel when I done this. It always seems to get me pumped up for a meeting and then I feel like calling my sponsor and telling on myself.
The thing that works best is to talk to my H.P. and tell Him how I'm feeling (He knows and knows why) and ask Him to help me get out of myself. It never fails if I'm willing to be willing to try.
~~~~~~~ Thanks pinkchip!!! spoken like a true oldtimer!!! (in my opinion) All we have is our ES&H and thats what we share. (((hugs)))
Hey Doll I guess we all get a turn and its yours today!!! Booo! I do hope you hit a meeting or two and try to get out of yourself...There are some people that probably need your strength and hope in the rooms! So you already know what you need to do, now just go do it...I was always told when you dont feel like doing something, you probably really need to go do it anyways! I hope you get out of your funk soon..... Love ya and big hugs!!!!!
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
I'm not sure what your physical activity level is like, but for me, doing something physical works wonders.
I totally didn't want to leave my house last night, just felt like being lazy at home watching tv for the night, but my friends convinced me to come out and play hockey, and I felt great after the workout. Doing something physical and making yourself sweat boosts your brain activity and makes you feel good.
Sometimes my Spiritual Malady gets a foothold & seduces me into wanting to feel sad & isolate. It begins real slow & subtle & before you know it I've been thinking all kinds about how inept I am, the no place I'm going to & how little I've managed to do with my life which is completely not true for any of it! I felt a sadness today even though I was doing things that are good for me i.e. massage & yoga but still this inner sadness ensued ever so quietly..
Eventually I got to a meeting (after thinking I might not go) & got busy making the tea & speaking to a newcomer. My Higher Power surged into me & then the group leader asked me to share on powerlessness & surrender. It was exactly just what I needed & the meeting was beautiful. It gave me a real kick start & boost even though I was pacticing my Prog to the best of my ability for today. It's amazing that we don't have to do this alone & that we're in this together, Jen. I hope you get to one of your fave meetings soon & get that invisible, spiritual injection! Danielle x
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
I love all these suggestions, and as you know Doll, I had struggled with being "down" for some time until recently. Way too long, as a matter of fact. I did not "feel" sad, I was just behaving like a sad person.
While you may not have the depth or length of depression I had, just know that if you try these other mentioned things and are still feeling down, there is always outside help.
You are loved and appreciated here. And you have gone through a lot of growing lately in many aspects, as you have shared with us in the past few months. Your sharing all this stuff has helped so many of us in so many ways, including me. I hope you come out of this soon. Let God guide you to what you need to be doing.
(((((((hugs)))))))
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
