Whew, a lot has been going on lately. First, my older brother got arrested a few weeks ago (first arrest ever at age 49) on a domestic violence charge. He and my sister in law were arguing over finances and he grabbed her by the arm. He's now moved out of the house where they have three children. The one blessing is that they all have agreed to go to counseling; I really hope that it works and some changes happen. Then, about three days after his arrest, my 19 year old niece, who was away at college, had some form of mental breakdown and was placed on a 72 hour hold (which became a 7 day hold). We withdrew her on a medical leave from school and brought her back to southern California where she's staying at my Mom's house (right up the street from my house). She's finally admitted that she's an alcoholic, so I've been taking her to meetings (she has 18 days sober today). Still trying to find a local psychiatrist and psycho-therapist, so that her mental health issues can be addressed (she's been prescribed a low dose antipsychotic medication by the doctor where she was in college). Meanwhile, my Mom's youngest sister was involved in a car accident which caused brain injury. She had brain surgery late last week, and my Mom went to Chicago to be with her. So, I'm spending the nights at my Mom's house so that I can take care of my niece. My niece confided in me yesterday that she hadn't had a period in two months, and thought she might be pregnant. I called my gynecologist, who told me to go ahead and do a home pregnancy test before she went in for an appointment. Fortunately, the test showed a negative result, and we go to see the gynecologist tomorrow morning.
So, it's all been a whirlwind, but I'm sober and grateful. Heading to a meeting tonight with my niece. My family and I could really use your prayers.
Thanks for sharing how it's all going in your world, BGG. That sounds like so much to deal with but you sound sober & supportive in amongst there. You're an asset to your family & I'm glad they have you with them. My prayers are with you all too & I hope much improves in the near future. Domestic Violence, hey? That sounds like an extreme diagnosis. DV is a systematic downgrading of a partner over a period of time where the purpose is for power & control. There is a difference between a loss of temper & this kind of abuse. I hope counselling is all that's needed to straighten that out. Prayers are with your brother & his family. I'm sorry for your Aunty & prayers are with her for the best result possible from her injury. May your Mum be consoled too. As for your niece, she's fortunate to have your message & I hope she finds herself loving & loved well in the fellowship. May her mental & emotional wellbeing be much improved soon no matter how her circumstances unfold. Godblessings with you, BGG. Have a Good Day today whatever it brings x Love & Prayers, Danielle x
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
Prayers are going up for you and your family. Wow, Im so glad you are sober today and offer your family love and support! Im sure it feels great to be able to be there for everyone! Scary but life does go on and today we are well equipt to handle all the struggles that may come our way!
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
BGG, you sure can count on some prayers for your family and you! If you were not sober, think how different your ability to help would be! This is when it really counts (not that it ever DOESN'T...) when the people we love need US for a change. I admire all that you are doing to help those around you right now. Don't forget to take a moment for YOU where you can!!
Love and hugs, Joni
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
An update: the appointment with the gynecologist went fine; my niece has some cysts on her ovaries which have thrown her whole cycle off, and he prescribed some new oral contraceptives to get her hormonal levels back in balance. He also did a bunch of other tests and will have those results back next week.
My niece has admitted she's been using Ecstasy, and there's a good possibility that that's what has caused the psychosis. We're seeing the psychiatrist tomorrow, and then she will see a psychotherapist. I've been encouraging her to be totally honest with all of these doctors so that she can get the treatment she needs. This has been all very scary to me, and it occurs to me that I may need to find a family support group for those who are dealing with loved ones suffering with Ecstasy side effects. It's not a drug I ever tried, but from what I've read online, can have some very nasty side effects. She is extremely paranoid (seeing things that aren't there) and has an over the top level of anxiety (thinking she's going to die, that her family is going to die, that the police are tracking her, etc).
I talked to my Mom yesterday, and my aunt's condition has worsened. The doctors have listed her in grave condition and she is still under sedation and they are now trying to fight off some form of infection on her brain. My mom, of course, is a wreck.
My brother and sister-in-law are being civil to each other for their kids' sakes, but right now both seem to be resolved that their 21 year marriage is over. They are both starting individual counseling next week, however, so one really never knows. Whatever happens, I hope both of them and the kids get the help they need.
I'm talking to my sponsor several times each day, and am trying to get to as many meetings as possible while I care for my niece. My colleagues at work are being very supportive, and filling in for me on various client matters this week. I must say, in 20+ years in the Program, I've never had a short period of time like this with so many challenges. But, I'm very grateful to have the fellowship of A.A. and a better personal relationship with God. But for those things, I'd be an absolute mess. I try to remind myself constantly, "This Too Shall Pass" and "God Is In Control."
Wow, BGG, you are a true example of faith and strength right now, not to mention simply putting one foot in front of the other! I am so glad you have the support of your sponsor, and to boot, your coworkers during all this. It is truly amazing, the human spirit in action, isn't it?
Your niece definitely has some challenges ahead of her. Many times, there are all kinds of "recipes" for ecstacy, and the user never knows what he or she is really getting--- LSD, rohypnol, who knows what the folks that manufacture it up-and-decide to put into each batch. I pray that she will be able to get some great help, and it sounds like you are really trying to provide that for her. If it weren't for my own aunt, I would be a goner!! She is in Alanon, which has helped her and her alanon friends deal with so much more than just alcohol's effects on their loved ones' lives. I am quite sure with 20-years in the program, you are aware of alanon, and will make use of it if you think it is fitting for this circumstance.
I do hope as well that your aunt will be able to come out of this horrible state she is in. And that your brother's situation will resolve and that all concerned will be happier and healthier as a result of the crisis, and their choices to seek help.
I am seeing my stepson soon over the holidays. He is 9 years old and has been hospitalized twice this year due to severe mental problems. He has acted out in ways that point to very severe violent psychosis. The things he has done here and at home and school over the years are truly frightening, even to an adult. It is so very hard feeling helpless where he is concerned, especially for my husband, as his sons live 1,000 miles away. We are going to sit down and go over all the medical reports with his mother when they come up for the Holidays. When I feel weak and frustrated, I will think of you and know that we can get through it, if we adults work together, and I stay sober.
Thank you for sharing from your heart what is going on in your life, and I want you to know you have helped me by your sharing it. I pray that you are granted the quiet time you need during all of this, as well, and I know that God will not let you down, just as you know it.
(((hugs and prayers))) Joni
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
