For over a year now I have been a faithful member of an online AA group. They have 3 online meetings a day and I usually make all of them. Well yesterday there was an incident. Some guy there introduced himself as a caffine addict. And he went on and on about caffine. Well I questioned the chair about it and he said that they welcome any addiction. Well as far as I am concerned this goes against AA Tradition. When I continued to challenge him on it he permanantly banned me from the meeting and the message board for life!!! Monday morning I am going to call AA World Services and see what they say about this. Allison
sorry to hear about your experience at that group. you had a valid point but calling the AA general services is a waste of time. In accordance with the 4th tradition.. "each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or AA as a whole" the AA general services will not even comment about it with you. That was their answer to the "Midtown Groups" of washingtion dc's issues, which were unbelievable.
Thank you Dean and Doll. Just you both justifiying that I had a valid point makes me feel better! I am just so sad because I really loved this group and I am gonna miss it so much. I dont feel well most of the time and even if I did I have a hard time getting to f2f meetings and this group really sustained me. Anyway thank your for your replys. Love, Allison
Hi Allison, To reply to Jen's comment about 'caffiene making one's life unmanagable', am sort of curious about that one too. The reason......I am one of the ALL time caffiene junkies. There is not a hour in the day that there isn't a Mt.Dew in hand. Plus my boss is as bad with his cherry Coke. The most predominate side effect by experience has been nervousness/jittery. However, I can do what is to be done which at times means standing for hours in the same place. Only once (and the job was designated 'rush') did I get teased about the habit. The comment was 'damn, now we know.....give her a Dew and she'll go in overdrive'. LOL My boss on the other hand, can't stand to sit for long so he wanders through the shop quite constantly at neck break speeds. He still manages to run this multimillion dollar business!!! As for the group.... When I first sought help I went to ALANON. All I could 'see' was a bunch of 'bit_ _ _ ing'. I was wanting help to get ME through the ordeal in my own personal life. I wanted to know how to move forward, proceed, ect. I just didn't care at the time to go through the dramas of everyone else's experience. I wanted solutions and wanted them NOW. So that led to going to the 'mouths of babes'/AA. There I was more comfortable. Curious though.....AA taught me compassion.....thus that led back to ALANON. I can now trully appreciate the drama as I was more self centered back then. As was suggested, there is not soley one group out there. Though it is a disappointment to be banned you may find another that has all that you need and more. It as well may be HP saying.....time to move on. Best wishes, Wanda
Hi Nique, I know that when I go to AA meetings they talk about being "cross addicted" so that may be something that this person needed to talk about.
I have been to many meetings where people are concerned about caffeine and that they subsituted it for the alcohol. So it can be of concern for some people. I just recently attended a meeting where a woman was a few weeks sober and had started drinking huge amounts of coffee and was very worried. She was desperate to share that and felt she shouldn't due to it being about alcohol.
Even though others shared about being cross addicted. I talked to her about it and she felt better.
I sometimes feel that when I talk to people who use caffeine that I am talking to a person who is an drug addict. No offense to anyone. So that maybe something this person truly is struggling with.
It can take over your life just like food addiction or any other addiction.
For those of you who use caffeine please do not get offended. To each his own but I wanted to express that this person may really have been in need of some help with it.
My sister in law stopped smoking and started eating a lot and is having a huge struggle for the substitution and because of the eating feels that cigarettes look good right now due to weight gain.
So this could be that caffeine could be a problem leading back to alcohol???
God bless and I am sorry about you losing your group. I feel that you should not have been banned and just as understood as the person with the caffeine problem. Rosie
I'd send a message to the administrator of the board maybe an apology is in order, Hard to believe you got a lifetime ban unless your not telling us the whole story. In face to face meeting a disrupting person might be given the boot but will be welcomed back later. If I'm at a meeting and I don't like the message/messenger I'll just get up and leave because it usually something that's going on with me.
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Work like you don't need the money
Love like you've never been hurt, and
dance like no one is watching.
Tradition 4 - With respect to its own affairs, each A.A. group should be responsible to no other authority than its own conscience. But when its plans concern the welfare of neighboring groups also, those groups ought to be consulted. And no group, regional committee, or individual should ever take any action that might greatly affect A.A. as a whole without conferring with the trustees of the General Service Board. On such issues our common welfare is paramount.
I'm not going to argue the 4th Tradition here, but even with that Tradition it doesn't allow for an AA Meeting is to be turned a place where non-alcoholics can go to discuss their problems. If I walked into an AA meeting only to discover that the room was full of Over Eaters Anonymous, Smokers Anonymous or {insert something} Anonymous it is NOT an AA meeting and I'd leave.
Tradition 5 - Each Alcoholics Anonymous group ought to be a spiritual entity having but one primary purpose - that of carrying its message to the alcoholic who still suffers.
nique went to talk AA not coffee! And to: permanently ban an alcoholic from the meeting and board for life, simply tells me that that person is on a POWER TRIP!
Someone addicted to caffeine, food, cigarettes or even sex, does not have the same problems as someone addicted to alcohol and should attend their own meetings. That's the opinion of this old timer!
My advice to nique: find other online groups and join, there has to be at least one or two {hundred}.
HUGS nique, and welcome here! Bruce
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Until I know what I'm doing, I'll ask questions from someone who has what I want. If I don't like the answer, it's probably the one I need!
With all due respect I don't know what's sillier, some clown coming to AA for a caffeine addiction, an AA group allowing that or you being so bent out of shape and resentful about being banned from such a ridiculous group.
It's like going to a restaurant and saying "That food was so shitty and the service was so bad that I want to go there everyday!"
I have to remember that in f2f AA, or in online AA, there will be plenty of folks I just do not agree with, and plenty of discussions that I deem "inappropriate". But then, I have to check myself. Have I ever gone to a meeting and griped on and on about something totally non-AA related? You betchya'. One of my favorite slogans is "How Important Is It?" and also, "Do I want to be RIGHT, or do I want to be HAPPY?"
So...... stay right here, and be HAPPY with the rest of us.
((((hugs))))
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
