Sobriety is more than just abstaining from alcohol. I like this definition from Money and the Meaning of Life by Jacob Needleman.
There are certain alcoholics--we have all known them, we have most of us suffered from them and loved them, many of us are them--who have a certain compelling beauty, charm, creativity that compels us to love them or care for them, but who at the same time are deeply and irrevocably frightened, weak, childishly incapable of seeing or listening either to another or to themselves in the midst of the difficulties and responsibilities that life brings to all of us. That, after all, is the spiritual definition of neurosis--the constitutional inability to see oneself. Spiritually posited, neurosis has nothing to do with how one behaves or suffers; it has nothing to do with the fact that the psyche is infused with contradictions; it is primarily the failure of the capacity to attend to the truth about oneself, whatever it may be, with an awareness free of emotionalism--a capacity, by the way, which the great spiritual masters of early Christianity and Sufism called sobriety.
Sobriety [is] "the capacity to attend to (deal with) the truth about oneself, whatever it may be, with an awareness free of emotionalism (fear)". Which is equal to and including the ability to "Live life on life's terms".
My tendency is to try and live life on My terms, and if that doesn't happen, I get very emotional about it . Alcohol may have exascerbated my neurotic tendencies, but did not cause them. I was in possession of these defects long before I ever drank, even kindergarten and earlier. How you say? Simple, I learned them from my parents (both alcoholics )
Alcohol may have exascerbated my neurotic tendencies, but did not cause them. I was in possession of these defects long before I ever drank, even kindergarten and earlier. How you say? Simple, I learned them from my parents (both alcoholics )
I identify with that one, Dean. My earliest memory of such tendencies is about age 5.....and my parents are not alcoholics, nor do they even drink.
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
Hi Jed, Thank you for the definitions. It is nice to see those to keep it simple.
My parents are alcoholics. My Dad died in 1990 after not drinking for 25 yrs but died from alcoholism. My Mom had not drank for 27 yrs when Dad died, picked it back up for about 6 yrs and now has been sober for almost 10 yrs.
My Dads parents never drank a drop and did not believe in it. My grandparents had 9 children. They all drank and to excess. My Moms Mother did not drink at all and my Moms Dad drank a lot.
It is like anything that we can inherit and from God knows where.
It is a controversial topic many times as to why or how we become alcoholics or addicts of all sorts. I feel history is a good thing but it does not matter in the big scheme of our plight. It is important we just get sober in all ways.
I never try for humility. I can be a really arrogant s.o.b. and if I were trying to be humble, I would probably say "Gee, I'm really humble today" and then I don't have any humility at all. Instead, I try to forget myself and to be of service.
Sobriety is a state of mind. It is tranquility, peace, humility, and serenity. It is a place where we can enjoy the "inner silence," and realize that at times we may be alone but we're never lonely.
In my opinion, the ultimate goal of sobriety is love, trust, honesty, and respect. Not only for ourselves but for others.
This is pretty profound for me. It can mean the excesses of self pity, anger, dangerous levels of "elation", work, inactivity, self-importance, having to always be "right"..... the list could go on and on. Too much of anything for me can be toxic.
I like this definition. I have seen a lot of definitions of the word sobriety that I didn't much care for, as they focused on simply not having alcohol in the body... but we AA's come to know sobriety as so much more.....
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
What is sobriety ? In the world I think it means not drinking. In AA I have learned it means alot. Being sober I think different so I have sobriety. I don't drink anymore but in the beginning I still acted like a crazy man I don't believe I was sober then I just didn't drink. My mind was doing its best to get alcohol I realize that now I'm enjoying sobriety now and it is a wonderful journey with its ups and downs. I have concluded Its a word like all other words Its what you want it to mean. or how you wish to use it. Like love I love icecream but I also love my wife but I didn't marry a gallon of icecream. Good journeys