Well, I have learned from other posts that I should introduce myself and qualify - so here goes!
I am a 37 year old single mom from the west coast. I have a beautiful 16yr old daughter and it has basically been just the two of us for that 16 yrs.
My sobriety date is 8/2/8 - and so far so good! I have heard a lot of people say "I grew up drinking" - well I grew into drinking. Things have escalated over the last few years and I have had more black outs than I can count, should have multiple DUIs, several with my daughter in the car, and made and ass out of myself more than I ever thought possible. I am tired of waking up hung over, tired of risking everything I have worked for, and most of all tired of my daughter seeing me like this. 2 years ago she said "I have only seen you drunk twice". Well, some of that was purely me hiding it, some was her youth and lack of understanding, but some of it was I hadn't yet turned up the volume. Over the last two years she has probably lost count, had to clean up after I puked all over the house and had a complete breakdown - and been in the car while I drove up the coast (high cliffs, windy road) for two hours and don't remember it.
I have come out of this pretty unsathed all in all, but know if I keep going down this path my luck will run out - and I could ruin the fantastic relationship with my daughter and teach her how to drink.......not high on my list.
I am 7 days in and have been to 5 meetings, taken my first commitment and actively looking for a sponsor. I would love to say I am enjoying it....but fake it until you make it....right?
Thanks for listening.
tlc
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__________________ "By swallowing evil words unsaid, no one has ever harmed his stomach." ~Winston Churchill
I'm glad that you're here with us. I couldn't have stayed sober without AA and having a great sponsor. Just hang in there and you will start to enjoy living a wonderful sober life.
Please keep posting and letting us know how things are going for you, won't you?
Take care,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Welcome to MIP, Tlcate. I'm glad you're here & thanks for sharing with us. You sound keen & willing which will send you far in sobriety 1Day@aTime. Stay curious & keep your new good example. You're already changing the quality of your daughter's life. And yours. Very important that! Wishing the best for you. Keep coming back. Recovery love & luck, Daniella (22mths sober thanks to AA; it works if you work it ;) x
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
Welcome to MIP!!!! I too have a 16 yr old daughter and 15 year old son...Hopefully will break the cycle of insanity and It wont touch them to much..Lots of making up and changing to do but I can already see a change in my relationship with my babies! Good luck!
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
Hi Tlcate, I have my date for today August 11 and I pray to make it this time. I did well for two weeks with no problem and then I picked up again and off to the races again about a month ago.
Now I am reaching out and not staying alone in this. Good for you to do this. I have read on here all day and decided to join. It has helped me so much already.
Those blackouts are hard to take. I know for me I have spent a fortune in drinking between the taxis and going out plus buying alcohol at home and not having my senses about me and lending money out when I was drinking and my self preservation got very low.
It is scary all the way around. I also now have started to drive at times and taking more risks also. And to think of my kids being affected and not doing things with them that are important.
I also have been scared of dying the way I am living or in the midst of a drunk. I do things I never would do sober and put up with people who I would not ever deal with. I have not been with men or anything but I allow people around that I would not ever do sober.
I am happy to be on this board. You can do it just as I can one day at a time and as I read on here to not pick up that first drink. I look forward to seeing you on here. Rosie
