I decided to stop drinking three weeks ago after reading "Dry" by Augusten Burroughs (really good read). I am no doubt an alcoholic, but after reading his memoir I decided that enough is enough. I dumped all my booze and have been sober since. My problem is that I am scared to death to go to a meeting. What if I see someone I know? I would be so embarrassed. I feel like I really need to go because I don't have a support system. I am getting really itchy to drink and I don't want to scratch it. How did all of you go to your first meeting? Did you bring a friend? Thanks for all your input.
What if I see someone I know? I would be so embarrassed.
Why would you be embarrassed for someone at a meeting to see you at a meeting?
I can almost guarantee you that anyone who has reached deep inside themselves and summoned the courage to go to an AA meeting wouldn't pass judgement on you. There's a million and one excuses to not go to meetings and most of us have used them all. Just grow a pair and go...and then keep going no matter what that crazy little alcohol shriveled walnut of a brain of yours says afterwards. And if the meeting is unbearably bad (which some are) then find another meeting where you feel more comfortable.
Act now while your sincerity and motivation is high...the booze isn't going anywhere, if you change your mind it'll be there waiting for you, licking it's chops.
Welcome to MIP. Congrats on your decision to quit drinking and on three weeks sober. That's great.
Don't be scared of going to a meeting. We have all felt just the way you are now. But, everyone who goes to an AA meeting is going for the same reason that you are. You won't be judged, but you will be helped and given as much support as you want/need.
And, don't worry about seeing someone you know at a meeting. They're there for the same reason that you are. And, they'll be glad to see you.
Try going to a few meetings. I couldn't stay sober without my meetings and have some truly great friends now.
I 'phoned the local AA helpline and someone who attends the meeting met me outside and explained what would happen and introduced me to a few people there. If it's an 'open' meeting then you could take a friend with you for support. Try 'phoning your local helpline and chatting to the person who answers. We've all been there.
Please keep posting and letting us know how things are going for you, won't you?
Take care,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Welcome Hot T, they call them Annonymous meetings for a reason. If you did see someone else that you knew at the meeting, they would be glad to see you and likewise. Think of it as a rescue ship that picked up the survivors of the Titanic (or any other ship wreck) because that's what an alcoholic's life is. Are you going to reamain in the frigid water and drown, or are you going to get on board?
Look up meetings in your area online (google is your friend). Choose a couple. Call your local AA intergroup (phone # is in the phone book or online). Talk to a recovering person that will answer the phone. They will listen to you and answer your questions. They can arrange for someone to take you to a meeting so that you don't have to go alone. This is a good idea, I did it.
At the beginning of every meeting the leader of that meeting will ask if there is anyone new to AA. Identify yourself as new (first name only) so that people can introduce themselves to you. You will receive a warm welcome. Your fears are unfouded and you really need to brush them aside and get to some meetings. If you think about it, you're just having the same reaction as you did on the first day of school or going into a new job. Remember those days? You survived.
My problem is that I am scared to death to go to a meeting. What if I see someone I know? I would be so embarrassed.
Fear of the unknown is a bitch, to say the least. But remember this, if you do see someone you know just remember they're there for the SAME reason as you. They, too, have a problem with alcohol.
There is no shame in seeking help.
Almost half of my graduating class attends my home group! My biggest 'cheerleader' (aside from my sponosor) is a 10th grade classmate who used to try to copy my tests! I got many hugs, pats on the back and couple "it's about time!"
Walk thru that fear, it's worth it. It's worth your life.
(((hugs)))
-- Edited by Doll at 07:44, 2008-08-07
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
Hey there...I'm new, terrified, still slightly hungover from two days ago, and surviving minute by minute. I went to my first meeting a week ago with a friend who happens to be in about the same place I'm in and suggested we go together, and I'm really glad we did. I staggered to my second and third meeting yesterday...I guess I've just taken a leap of faith and have my fingers crossed that this is the right thing for me to do.
I noticed your post because I loved, loved, loved Dry (and everything else Augusten Burroughs has ever written). Would like to find and give whatever help I can here.
Thank you all for your responses!!! I have printed out all the meetings they have in the area and I am just going to bite the bullet and go. I know I can't do this by myself. I was very private with my drinking so its just frightning to share that intimate part of myself with other people. Thank you, thank you, thank you for the extra nudge to go. Even when I told my mother that I wasn't going to drink anymore she said..."what do you mean, your never going to have a glass of wine with dinner?"
Stephanie (beautiful name BTW), hang in there!! After waking up on a weekend and not being hung over its is such a boost to stay on the path to sobriety. I got so many things done that I have been procrastinating doing forever, like painting my dining room and putting up new curtains in the bedroom. I bought the stuff to do it over a month ago. Its incredible how much more energy I have. I never realised how terrible I felt all the time from being hungover. It just became so normal to me. Weird.
Ok, I have gone on long enough already, thanks again!! and I will let you know how it goes.
I chose a meeting in a meeting in the opposite direction of where I live. Today, I found out from some people that they have been sober or are rebounding from a relapse. Interestingly enough, more and more people are quitting. I am meeting more and more people like myself. Also, the people who I met, turned me onto another meeting that I may attend. Maybe bouncing around will keep it fresh for me too! It sounds so good after a day of hard physical work....then I think of my brain-anxiety-and making a fool of myself in front of my kids. Phew...I need a meeeting. Thanks
Keep busy Hot Tamale, before you know it you'll have a year a sobriety Important to make some friends in AA to go and do things with. We have to learn how to do most everything over again without drinking. It's actually very enjoyable because it's like experiencing everything for the first time. Of course we have to "walk thru some fear" to get there
To AA's, seeing someone they "know" walk through the doors is something to be proud of. Proud of our program, our recovery, our HOPE. Most of the people I KNEW suspected I was an alcoholic long before I myself knew. And besides, anyone you might see there is obviously an ALCOHOLIC TOO!!!! Right??? NOe THERE is a common thread!
So take these comments, posts, good wishes and good old-fashion common sense with you, and go do the very thing that may change your life and heal it, in marvelous ways.
You do not want to miss your experience with the love and understanding in AA!! The rooms are full of joy, care, love, concern, and HOPE.
Take care, our new friend!
((((hugs)))) Joni
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
