Such is the paradox of A.A. regeneration: strength arising out of complete defeat and weakness, the loss of ones old life as a condition for finding a new one. A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 46

A thousand beatings by John Barleycorn did not encourage me to admit defeat. I believed it was my moral obligation to conquer my enemy-friend. At my first A.A. meeting I was blessed with a feeling that it was all right to admit defeat to a disease which had nothing to do with my moral fiber. I knew instinctively that I was in the presence of a great love when I entered the doors of A.A. With no effort on my part, I became aware that to love myself was good and right, as God had intended. My feelings set me free, where my thoughts had held me in bondage. I am grateful.