I want to welcome you both and I hope you'll keep coming back often... the more you share and get feedback, the better you get to know who and what you're all about. Going to lots of face-to-face AA meetings speeds up the process.
I came into AA thinking I was St. Alice, the sacrificial martyr.... you know, "If you had my problems, you'd drink too!" It wasn't long before I discovered that I was my problem! Until I started working the steps, I did not know the anger and rage and resentments that had festered within.
Good things take time. I drank for 6 years. I KNEW I couldn't stop drinking- my attempts never lasted a day. I knew I couldn't continue to drink either, because I would die... I had already been in a hospital for a whole month, near death because of my alcoholism. I managed to survive and was brought home to slowly regain strength enough to walk and 3 months later I was drinking again. I finally called AA and went to my first meeting and from then on things have continued to get better.
An old-timer said to me: "How badly do you want sobriety? Are you willing to go to any lengths to get and keep it?" I would have done cartwheels cross-country if they told me to. I came through the doors of AA in the depths of despair and pain.
I thank God daily for my sobriety. It's the most impottant thing in my life. I've come to accept that I'm an imperfect human being and that I strive for progress, not perfection. Only God is perfect, although sometimes I question His giraffes! I've learned to LIVE and LET LIVE! In the past I always had to have control. Had lots of lots of expectations of others, too.
May God bless you both with strength and courage to continue making progress in your AA programs. Please keep coming back here and share your thoughts and feelings. You help me, too.
