Page 14-15: "For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead."
Page 20, paragraph 1: "Our very lives, as ex-problem drinkers depend upon our constant thought of others and how we may help meet their needs."
Page 62, paragraph 2: "Selfishness, self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles."
Page 62, paragraph 3: "So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn't think so. Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kill us!"
Page 97, paragraph 2: "Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly act once in a while isn't enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan every day, if need be. It may mean the loss of many nights' sleep, great interference with your pleasures, interruptions to your business. It may mean sharing your money and your home, counseling frantic wives and relatives, innumerable trips to police courts, sanitariums, hospitals, jails and asylums. Your telephone may jangle at any time of the day or night."
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
"Integrity is telling myself the truth. Honesty is telling the truth to other people." --Spencer Johnson
I like this quote and think it should carry through in all of our lives. We can just sit by and watch other people fail or we can lovingly speak the truth to others so they may too have what we have!
Getting a swift kick in the butt is what I need sometimes to get me going on my program. Ive been reamed many times about pussy footing around on step 4. Those that give me this advise only share because they care! "Dont do it Laurie and you WILL drink." Yea its advise, but it is done with the utmost concern.
One of the greatest things about this board is most of us feel free to share the good times, bad times, silly times , times of grief and trouble. People listen, share and care. Sometimes with a little tougher hand than some of us would like but if you stick around long enough, you will find people on here that have been through the same things as you and will always be there for you. Its almost like you can share a little more than you would face to face because no one can see you!!
This does not mean you can hide in here and not get to know other people and learn to share with them!!!!
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
Ive been reamed many times about pussy footing around on step 4. Those that give me this advise only share because they care! "Dont do it Laurie and you WILL drink."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In meetings, I've yet to hear anyone share they'd relapsed after doing a 4th step. I feel certain they exist, I've just never heard it, ( yet).
For me, the 4th step was about WORK. And I just plain and simple didn't want to do it. Looking back, that's how I've lived my whole life. I'd get the things I wanted, like a house, car, husband, then it would be work to keep those things so I'd sell the house, trade the car and divorce the husband. When I got to AA, I wanted to stay sober but didn't want to do the work required to keep me sober. I kept putting off my 4th step, I relapsed..... I didn't have a revelation of any kind, nor did I see a burning bush, but I did feel different about my recovery after doing steps 4 & 5. And I've felt 'different' since then. My sponsor says that feeling is 'because it was your time'.
Thanks, for sharing, Laurie, & for letting me put in my 2 cents worth.
(((hugs)))
*Let me clarify by saying that I am no way indicating, suggesting, thinking or judging that you (or anyone ) will or might drink if you don't do a 4th step. Just sharing MY experience and what has been shared with me.
-- Edited by Doll at 18:57, 2008-05-29
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
In meetings, I've yet to hear anyone share they'd relapsed after doing a 4th step. I feel certain they exist, I've just never heard it, ( yet).
Just to add my "2 cents," I think one important qualifier to this observation is "in meetings." I did many, many fourth thru ninth steps in my first 15 years sober, typically a full 4th and 5th step just prior to each sobriety birthday. Then, I started resting on my laurels and gradually stopped going to meetings. So, I stopped hearing about the disease of alcoholism and the importance of the steps, and cut myself off from the support of the Fellowship. A few years later I got drunk, pounding on the bar, wondering what happened. What I learned from this is the importance of remaining forever vigilant, which for me means first of all staying connected to the Fellowship of AA. Somehow, it just seems to work out that if I keep going to meetings, I keep being reminded of the things I need to do, like doing a fourth step. I share this especially for those who've been sober a while and might think that a fourth step taken some time back has made them immune from ever drinking again. I had to learn the lesson the hard way, cuz I'm hard-headed.
I love going to meetings and usually hit at least 5-7 per week! Met sooo many nice people and look forward to seeing them. It amazes me how many people I have met through the program and how many have some great long term sobriety.
Working the steps, going to meetings, having a sponsor, doing community service and helping other AA's is alot of work, and will be for the rest of my life, one day at a time! But, its what keeps us sober! I agree, when we get complacent, thats when the old cunning alcoholic thoughts creep in!
Just like dieting.........lol Thats a whole other story!!!!
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
When I got to AA, I wanted to stay sober but didn't want to do the work required to keep me sober. I kept putting off my 4th step, I relapsed..... I didn't have a revelation of any kind, nor did I see a burning bush, but I did feel different about my recovery after doing steps 4 & 5. And I've felt 'different' since then. My sponsor says that feeling is 'because it was your time'.
