I have a hell of a story to tell.  When I was 18 years old I smoked a joint and got so stoned and about a week later I drank about 12 beers and smoked about 2 joints and did I ever get messed up.  The next two years I smoked more and more and drank more and more, switched from beer to bourbon and switched smoking pot to smoking pcp.  It was like I jumped off a cliff that is how fast I crashed, I ended up in a mental hospital after trying to kill myself and was in the hospital for about 2 years. Eventually I got out of the hospital and I was taking anti-depressants, drinking hard liquor and I told myself that as long as I did not smoke pot or do drugs everything would be fine. Well I crashed and burned again, but it took about 5 years of hard drinking hard liquor to do it.  I read in the newspaper an Article about 12 step programs and I joined one and in that program I came to realize that I was an alcoholic and an addict.  So I started AA six months after starting the other 12 step program. I was sober about 11 years when I did something so crazy that I have to laugh at it.  For some reason I wanted to make some quick money and the easiest quickest way I could think of to make that money was to manufacture a form of meth that was even more dangerous that the original, the rock form of meth called ice and also manufactured extacy.  Anyway as I quickly found out is that a person would have to wear a space suit while manufacturing narcotics not to end up high on them. Even though I did not intentionally take the drugs I ended up stoned to the gills off of all the fumes given off several hundred times in about six months.  Any way I gave up that foolishness about 10 years ago.  It was a little too late the damage had been done, I messed my brains up so bad That I lived in a residential center for the seriously chronicly mentally ill for about 5 years, while there I went to church, AA, and NA plus my meds were carefully regulated.  Eventually I moved out on my own. I stopped going to church, AA and NA which was December 1, 2005 that all that happened.  Well last week my psychiatrist confronted me about my lack of a spiritual life and said I would function much better with one than without one.  Well, Saturday April 29 I again went to a meeting and I am starting all over again. I may not have drank or drugged, but I could do much better with a spiritual program than I could without a spiritual program.  And that is my story. Hope ya'll did not fall asleep.